


b r e a t h e

by mxndaily



Category: Naruto
Genre: Akatsuki Haruno Sakura, BAMF Haruno Sakura, Courtroom Drama, Doctor Haruno Sakura, F/M, Haruno Sakura-centric, More tags as we go through this trainwreck, Multi, Not Beta Read, We Die Like Men, but just for like one chapter, the first arc is pretty draggy ngl but bear with me pls
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:14:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 21,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27577022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mxndaily/pseuds/mxndaily
Summary: "Its just I'm sick of breathing this toxic air you call justice."Sakura's a doctor. She took an oath swearing to protect life and well - to not kill. Doctors don't kill. Pretty weird since her two professions as a doctor and as a shinobi are completely contradictory in nature. Then again, that's probably why she got into this mess.Banished from her home after being accused for murder and treason, Sakura struggles to find new meaning to her life. And maybe along the way she meets some people just like her. (Oh shit, she's being lumped together with actual murderer-assassin-killers who flatten villages every other weekend.)Not a good sign, she thinks. But at this point she's got nothing left to lose.
Comments: 8
Kudos: 66





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Cross-posted from Wattpad under mxndaily
> 
> Hey guys I wrote sumthin pls approve like and comment and give me validation or i cry thnx i love you
> 
> I swear it gets better and actually interesting by like chapter 3!! just zoom through 1 and 2 for context!!!

** Sakura ** ** **

_breathe in_ , her hands trembled slightly at the grotesque sight before her.

_focus_

_breathe out_ , she steadied herself, falling into the rhythm of routine professionalism. _'i took an oath'_ , she reminded herself. She was a doctor. "Act like one, damn it." Sakura whispered under her breath, the pouring rain masking the sounds of the man's ever slowing breathing as he slowly bled to his eventual demise.

The forest loomed over her and the man whose mangled limbs laid by her knees, casting a pathetic dim light to serve as Sakura's guide in the cold, pouring thunderstorm that hindered her vision. Bloodied mud clung to her skin, seeping into her clothes as she desperately pulsed green chakra into the man's body. There was so much to repair yet so little chakra left in Sakura's reserves. A bloody gaping hole where his heart should be. There was no way he'd survive. The arteries immediate to his heart were severed and were gushing with a steady stream of red fluid. Visible were burns from friction and tentacle-like imprints, evidence of crushing down into the man's bare ribcage was like a paint stain on his skin.

Tearing out a man's heart? The work of a savage. Sakura couldn't let this man die here. It was her mission– Keep the Daimyou's nephew alive and safe. Protect the second in line to the monarchy of her country. Protect one of the Fire Country's three princes. To keep a man alive meant to keep him breathing. This man was not breathing.

_i've failed_

The man, no older than twenty, perished at her fingertips, the green glow fading from the girl's palms as she slowly gave into the creeping exhaustion up her spine. Her vision blurred. Yet, as much as she wished to simply sprawl onto the ground and soak in the crimson proof of her failure as a medic, the very hand that impaled the dead man's chest was looming around somewhere in that forest. Was it even a hand? She hadn't seen. It looked too foreign to be a handprint.

Was it those tendrils? The very thought sent shivers down her spine. How many hours had she been at this? She knew he was dead, why was she still trying?

_i'll be next i'll be devoured i'll be dead in the most gruesome way–_

Was it the fact that this was a prince? Or the fact that Tsunade has trusted her with her first S-ranked escort mission and she had failed so miserably? Perhaps it was the guilt of knowing what she had done, what she was planning to do in the aftermath.

The anxious rustling of vegetation had never soothed her more than it had in that moment.

"Over there!" God, she thought she'd meet her end there if she hadn't heard them sooner. People who could help her in her current state of near-complete chakra exhaustion and injury. "Haruno-san?! _Oh dear Lord, what have you done_ ," Sakura could barely remember the voice of this faceless shinobi who addressed her by name. Were they acquainted?

"We need to get him to the hospital. Right now." The shinobi and a couple of other helping hands reached for her, helping her onto her feet, only to shove her forward, urging her to walk on her own two battered and just more than slightly bone-fractured feet. One of the shinobi lurched forward in disgust, seeing one of the heirs to the Land of Fire reduced to a mere mangled corpse on the ground. Even the rain couldn't cover the look of disbelief on the faceless shinobi. "I thought you were a doctor, Haruno-san,"

Shame, Sakura felt. She kept her chin high. She didn't feel the need to give excuses for her mistakes. Errors were perfectly normal, a very human trait where many learned and grew from. Some errors, unfortunately, were too grave to be overlooked.

"What happened to him? Why didn't you stop the bleeding?!" The voice of a female shinobi cut through the thundering rain.

Sakura merely glanced her way and shrugged. "An ambush," was all the girl offered as reply. What more could she say, really?

Sakura winced every step of the way as the group of them scurried back to the village, heading straight to the emergency room where Sakura's malpractice would be on display. Laid out on a haphazardly prepared operating table only to be declared dead by an undertrained staff who would prod at the several-hours dead man's chest in vain. Sakura, of course, like any other faceless shinobi, would be sent to the common infirmary for a check up. Administered a few medicines and be sent on her merry way.

It was at the doors of the hospital where she locked eyes with her mentor's fiery ones. She spared Sakura a brief glance as she stormed into the operating theatre, determination and anxiety blending oddly on her features. Her jacket was strewn onto the nearest chair as she went in to salvage whatever she could in order to preserve the prince's life.

But he was already dead. Had been dead for hours.

Sakura sat by the waiting chairs of the operating room silently, head down, making herself as small as possible. A man died in her arms, yes. But she also -

'No, don't think about it.' God, what kind of doctor _does_ that? Her role was simple. Keep the man alive. Her headthrobbed, the room spinning...

_shameshameshameshame—_

A slammed door. "Sakura." It was her teacher.

_you call yourself a doctor?_

"I told you this was an important mission, didn't I?" Tsunade's firm gaze bore into Sakura's very being. She could feel Tsunade staring her down in reprimand.

Sakura meekly nodded. "You've never failed me, Sakura. Ever," Tsunade spoke. "You know that mistakes tend to happen. It's okay to make mistakes sometimes," Tsunade's voice started to waver slightly.

"Why is the one time you screw up is the one time that I had hoped you wouldn't?" Tsunade's voice was hauntingly soft, her hand on Sakura's shoulder. The gesture was more to steady herself than to comfort her mentee that sat on the faded plastic chair before her.

Sakura hung her head low. Shame, she felt. She couldn't keep her chin up anymore.

"I'll try to keep the Daimyou off you," Tsunade whispers, "The spiteful old man is sure to overexaggerate but I should be able to keep the worst off you,"

"It was an ambush, right?"

Sakura doesn't meet her mentor's eyes, gaze fixed to the off-white hospital floor. "Yeah, just an ambush," the teenager paused in hesitation before continuing. "The attacker's ability set was strange – I've never seen anything like it."

The blonde nodded, "Follow up on it with Shizune. I'll have her look through a bingo book to find a match."

"Anything else?" She probes, knowing very well that there was something else the young girl wasn't telling her.

Sakura shakes her head as a 'no', earning a sigh from the older woman, the previous instruction already forgotten by the silent teen.

"For now," Tsunade glanced at the bloodied and dirt-covered clothes of her student, deep cuts and bruises littering her form, "get some rest. Read a book or two. My library is always open to you, okay?" Sakura let out a breath she hadn't realised she had been holding in.

"Thank you, Tsunade-sama." Sakura said. As she stood to walk out of the dreadful hospital, Tsunade grab her by the arm, whispering words she wished she had taken to mean more seriously.

"Remember your position, Sakura. People are always watching you – Hokage's apprentice and the youngest doctor in Konoha," Tsunade reminds the teenager who keeps a blank expression, watching as the hospital staff scurried about.

"So make sure you lay low,"

And like any other faceless shinobi, Sakura was then sent on her merry way.

Well, as merry as someone like Sakura could possibly manage.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really have to edit this fic its borderline absolutely terrible

** Sakura **

The next morning was dull. Grey skies, cloudy mornings and a morning drizzle that littered the streets with millions of tiny water droplets. The monsoon season was apon them in their usually sun-abundant village.

Sakura too, awoke, dull. The floors were cold, soft echoes of life barely bouncing off the walls. Her home was silent. This was normalcy, for nobody in the house spoke to Sakura anymore.

She had been rather fickle-minded as a child. Easily influenced, vain, unmotivated. It was no surprise that her parents hadn't expected her to last long as a shinobi. They encouraged her nonetheless, carelessly pushing for the child to find passion rather than to find her habits in hopping from one trade to another, never truly becoming a master of anything.

Yet here they were, child grown into a young adult. Child grown into a soulless shell that killed for sport, lied shamelessly for benefit. She became understandably reserved. What use did civilians have of knowledge that only a shinobi would have use for? Nothing. They had no common ground to strike even the smallest of talk with their one and only child. They didn't foresee what it meant to house a killer by trade in their home.

Sakura falls back into the routines. Wake up, clean up, eat up, _get out._

She saw her parents freeze as she walked out the bedroom door. She saw the headlines of the front page paper her father held in his shaking grip as he put on an act of nonchalance as she ate on the same dining table as he. She saw her mother's relief when she left the house with merely a picosecond of eye contact and a quick goodbye.

" _haruno sakura_ ," the shinobi whispered in disgust. " **Doctor Death!** " The villagers openly shamed with revolt and sneer. The Monarch Murderer, The Hokage's Star Failure.

_she felt like she was suffocating_

Three days ago, Sakura had left the grand gates of her home as an esteemed doctor, beloved student of the Hokage and the honoured convoy to the second prince of the Land of Fire. She was to deliver the prince to Konoha to accompany the Daimyou in his yearly visit to Konoha where the annual budget was to be discussed. The other two princes were scheduled to arrive in Konoha hours before the Second prince. The two, living, breathing remaining princes of the Fire country.

Truly, it was a sore disappointment that Sakura returned home alone and alive.

She came home three days later as an alleged murderer and a defamed medical practitioner. There had been no witnesses during the ambush to have confirmed anything other than the rumours that Haruno Sakura had attacked the prince out of greed, hoping to snatch a pretty ransom for the man. The story grew so wildly that she was now suspected to be a secret servant to the Land of Iron, a land that no shinobi would step into. Some stories made Sakura chuckle in amusement. Others made her anxious over how truly believable they were.

'This is how things just are,' Sakura consoled herself. 'I am a shinobi. Shinobi neither bear honour nor name in their work.'

_she danced too close to the fire, she was scorched by her own name_

'This mistake wouldn't have been blown so out of proportions had I been a chuunin-nobody.'

_she wouldn't have even been given the mission if she had not been the hokage's most trusted student and confidant_

'Shizune wouldn't have screwed this up,'

_shizune would never have even been sent on the mission._ _she wasn't suited for it._ _it was sakura who was capable. it w_ _as sakura who was responsible for the corpse that laid cold in the rain, dead long before help had arrived._

"Sakura?"

She snaps out of her trance, suddenly aware of all the eyes locked onto her.

Standing before the heir to the Yamanaka clan.

"Ino." Sakura greets curtly. The blonde sighs, eyes filled with worry for her friend. "I heard the news. What on earth are you doing in public at this time, forehead?" Ino chastised, pulling Sakura along with her to a more secluded road away from the market centre where Sakura had been wandering about.

"I honestly don't know, Ino," Sakura breathed. "It's suffocating to be at my parent's place. It's suffocating to be outside here. I can't even walk the streets that I've grown up in without being stared down by villagers that usually smile back at me whenever I walk by." The girl confided in her friend, the latter slightly perturbed that Sakura hadn't even retaliated at Ino's usual teasing.

Sakura was scared, she concluded.

The blonde girl offered a tight squeeze onto her friend's shoulder, smiling softly at the other girl whose expression was riddled with distress. "C'mon Sakura, don't be over dramatic. Nobody's really trying to suffocating you here. In fact, I'm sure this whole thing will blow over by next week. You're the village sweetheart, Sakura. The only other amazing person that the village could hold gawk over is me! So don't over-stress yourself with this, okay?" Ino's lightheartedness soothed the other's nerves slightly, forcing a small chuckle out of the pinkette.

_maybe she really was overthinking this. ino was always right, after all._

_Nobody else knew, after all._

"Tell you what," Ino excitedly jumps, happy energy radiating off her. "Let's go to my place."

"Like, right now?" Sakura asks, skeptical.

"Yes, now! Stupid dumb-dumb Forehead! Some green tea and dessert will definitely cheer you up!" Ino drags Sakura by the wrist as they jump over rooftops and hurriedly make their way to the Yamanaka compound.

"I don't think this is a good time, Ino. What if–"

" _Aa, aa, aa!"_ Ino interrupted. "No what ifs! There's no harm in bringing you here, Forehead. I don't see what's the big commotion about here." Ino and Sakura walk through the final street and turn into the sizeable entrance to the Yamanaka clan compound.

Inoichi Yamanaka stands before them, quickly dismissing a group of clansmen at the sight of his beloved daughter and her best friend.

_her disgraced best friend_

"Ino." Inoichi says sternly. Ino rolls her eyes, hand on her hip as a show of irritation. "Hello to you too, dad. Sakura and I'll be in my room if you need–" Inoichi raises his hand, politely interrupting his darling girl.

"I believe I made myself clear this morning, Ino. You are _not_ to go looking for Sakura and you are not to be hanging around her anytime soon. Especially not ten hours after the news explodes about her country-wide!" Inoichi chastises, keeping a stern expression as best as he could.

At this, Ino's face twists into one of irritation and bubbling rage.

"Ino, I told you now isn't a good time." Sakura whispers, ashamed.

_she shouldn't have shown her face today_

"No, Sakura, you just don't get it. You too, dad. How can you be so cold to Sakura? She's been wronged. She's being slandered publicly all over the country. And I swear on every God's name, I will not leave her to bear this all alone. Can't you see she's scared, dad?"

"I understand where you're coming from, Ino. But don't you remember the mission you were sent on two years ago? Princess Fuku? Do you not remember how you had offended them? The daimyo's pettiness has made him hold a grudge against us. The Yamanaka's relations with the daimyo are not exactly good right now, Ino." 

Speechless, Ino submits to her father's calm anger, turning to Sakura with an unbearably apologetic expression.

"You know we love having you over, Sakura. Please do not misunderstand. It is nothing personal." Sakura nods in understanding, head still hung low from shame.

"I understand, Yamanaka-san."

_she really didn't want to understand. ino had a good name sakura was better off without a name_

"Ino, if you want the Yamanaka to remain in Konoha with roofs over their heads and food on their tables, you will understand why I cannot allow you and Sakura to be seen with each other while the daimyo are in town."

He turns to Ino, dismissing her back into the compound, away from Sakura, without even so much as a goodbye.

"I'm going to have to ask you to leave, Haruno Sakura."

_ino wasn't always right, sakura discovered._

"You should come over for tea once this gossip does down."

_she doubted she'll get to come back to visit her best friend's home ever again._

\---

"Doctor Haruno!" The nurse excitedly calls for her ask she walks through the hospital doors.

"Sir, Doctor Haruno is an incredible doctor. No matter what illness you have she will cure it! You see, Doctor Haruno is–"

"The Doc' _Death_ ," the old man spat at Sakura, disgust oozing out of his person.

Sakura wipes off the spit, respectfully lowering her head to the elderly man. "I'm sorry sir, you must be mistaken."

"M'staken? Oh, I know a traitor when I see one. You're a murd'rer, you are! Vile scum." The old man yells at the young doctor, who meekly stood in front of him, taking his words without retaliation.

"I won't take medicine from some kid that only has a good name because of 'er teacher! The Hokage's star _failure_ , you are!"

She was muted but she couldn't tell if it was her shame or her guilt that locked away her voice; **her dignity**.

The nurse hurriedly brings the old man away from Sakura, muttering small profuse apologies as she realises her mistake in putting the doctor under the limelight.

Sakura sighs in a mixture of relief and disappointment. The hospital staff really were incompetent.

The young doctor dejectedly trudges out of the hospital, leaving a wake of whispers of distasteful words as she held her head as high as she could with the shackles of shame dragging her down by the neck. She scurries to her mentor's library, seeking shelter from the eyes burning at her skin.

But was it the shame of failure or the shame of something for more disturbing that haunted her?

There was no work for her here.   
Perhaps never again.


	3. Chapter 3

"Eventful afternoon?"

Tsunade acknowledged Sakura's presence briefly, grunting out a distant " _busy_ " with a small eye roll in response as the blonde hunched over her stacks of papers and reference books, scribbling frantically onto a journal.

Sakura chuckles before letting out a small sigh of relief at the familiarity of the setting.

The library walls were stained off-white with accents of ashy reds. The room was bare in the centre, save for a large wooden working desk where Tsunade was sat at the moment. It was a rather deceptively small looking room. Bookshelves lined the room circularly in a maze-like fashion and the softest sound of machinery moving in the far background indicated that the library was indeed hiding its most prized information through regular rotation of its location. Truly, a labyrinth of knowledge was the term best to describe the Hokage's private library.

This was familiar. This room was no puzzle to Sakura whom had spent her teenage years burying her nose into the books at every book and cranny of the library.

Abruptly, Tsunade pushed her chair back with a screech, a fresh stack of documents and her journal in hand. "Sakura," the busty woman calls, voice laced with fatigue.

"I'm off for the meeting with the Council. We've got to sort out the agenda for the annual budget meeting with the Daimyou. Put this back with the rest of the journals. The bookshelf at the back over there, you've seen it before?" Tsunade hands the journal to her student before pointing off to a particular set of shelves.

"I'll find it, don't worry," Sakura smiles gently as she grasps the thick book, slips of papers stuffed crudely in between the pages. "Don't forget to drink some water, Tsunade-sama. You look like a zombie right now. Green, wrinkly skin and all." Sakura chuckles as Tsunade pinches her nose bridge to combat the incoming migraine.

"Yeah, yeah. Get me some booze when I get out of this meeting. God knows I'll need it after," Tsunade whispers the last with a small, tired laugh. The blonde reaches for the door handle, pausing slightly. Tsunade glances over to Sakura, almost as an after thought.

"You've been listening to me when I said lay low, right? You've been quiet?"

Sakura sighs, lips dipping into a frown. "I didn't kill anyone else if that's what you're insinuating. I met up with Ino but Yamanaka Inoichi-san threw me out literally a metre into the compound. That's about it," Sakura tactfully omits the fact that she caused quite a scene in the hospital prior to her arrival.

"Good, good. That's good." Tsunade breathes in relief.

"Don't go near the Daimyou and the other two princes, understand? You must not make contact with them, you must not take action before I work things out on my end. Do you understand me, Sakura?" Tsunade whispers sternly, leant towards her student.

"Now, are you sure there's nothing else you're not telling me?" Sakura met her mentor's hardened gaze, a stern look that threatened her for the truth and nothing but.

**_"Direct your chakra into this region here," Tsunade points onto the fish's gill. "Don't pulse your chakra but make sure it's not weak. The body is small so there's a limit, understand?"_ **

**_"I-I-I'll try my best!" A young, enthusiastic Sakura replies anxiously, instructions flying over her head._ **

**_"I expect you to do more than your best because you're capable, but you're not answering me. Do you understand, Sakura?"_ **

"I didn't kill the prince," a sudden spike of defensiveness bubbles within her as she faced her teacher. "I swear to you Tsunade-sama this is all one terrible mistake." She held back the tears threatening to spill she had no right to cry _dontcrydontcrydontcry–_

"I believe you, Sakura." The blonde's eyebrows furrow at her student's sudden outburst, eyeing the tears brimming on her lower lids. "You and Shizune? I trust you with my life. I'll find you a way out of this. Council be damned,"

Tsunade grips Sakura's shoulder reassuringly before rushing off towards the meeting room.

Sakura leans halfway out the door, gazing at her mentor as she strutted down the corridor, heels clacking against the wooden planks.

"I'll get you water instead of booze, Zombie-sensei!" Sakura smiles sadly, arms folded round her torso.

She hated it when Tsunade tried to give her hope.

\---

Booze bottle and water bottle in one hand and Tsunade's journal in the other, Sakura exits the pantry and heads back to the library wordlessly.

"Haruno."

Sakura turns to face the voice addressing her, masking the small glimmer of surprise as she recognises the figure before her.

"Councilman Shimura-sama. How can I be of assistance?"

Danzo scans the teenager, seemingly profiling her. "You're a curious case, Haruno Sakura."

Sakura's confusion is forced into an expression of politeness. "I apologise I don't understand what you mean–" Danzo cuts the girl off with a single gesture.

"You do not speak unless you are spoken to. Did Tsunade not teach you manners, child? Then again, I wouldn't expect that woman to hold any proper manners herself much less teach them to some mediocre apprentice."

"Excuse me?" Sakura huffs. _Manners?_ Was this man, _who was bad mouthing the Hokage,_ really about to go off about manners?

"You, Haruno Sakura, are not a genius, and yet you are privileged to take up apprenticeship under a legendary genius doctor and you yourself are highly regarded as a skilled medical practitioner despite your young age. You do not excel in regular offensive ninjutsu unlike your genin teammates,"

"And yet here you are, somehow a talentless child that made it to the big table. Tell me, Haruno Sakura, are you merely a talentless nobody that simply got lucky?"

She fought off the urge to punch his face into the floorboards there and then.

"Tell me, councilman," Sakura forced a saccharine smile. "How many sixteen year old doctors have you met?"

"Plenty back in my day. An age of war calls for every abled body to contribute to the village."

"And we are no longer in the age of war, councilman." She was no longer smiling.

She really didn't need to play politics at a time like this. Couldn't he just leave her alone?

"But war will come, Haruno. Your naivety must be influenced by Tsunade, no? _Peace. Tranquility._ We live in a world of shinobi. A world of power. Do you really think everyone will just sit idly, _peacefully_? We need geniuses, Haruno. Your genin team was put together with the expectations of creating the next generation of great shinobi. The massively powerful jinchuriki and the naturally gifted Uchiha boy. What was Hiruzen thinking, tainting their potential with a civilian-born? He claimed you had potential as an intellectual, an analyst. All I see now is a child trying to play grown-up. How is it like, being an adult, Haruno? Being accused for murder? For _treason_?"

Shame bubbled in her chest so violently. As if being shamed by her best friend's father hadn't been enough. The embarrassment was overwhelming. _theshametheguilttheanger—_

She was angry.

"There can only be so many geniuses in one generation, Coucilman," Her knuckles made a sickening crack as she attempted to soothing her tightened her fists.

"It was merely a coincidence that I was placed in a team of once in a generation powerhouses. And I do consider myself lucky to be here, but I work hard to improve myself. I am thankful that Tsunade-sama is teaching me."

Danzo scoffs. "You think too much of yourself, Haruno. You are bitter that your worthlessness has just as expectedly contributed nothing to your genin team. When that Uchiha scum left, you did nothing. You have done nothing to contribute to this village. You allowed our carefully curated generation of geniuses run amok. One of which who went as far as to betray us." Danzo's words were spat venomously at her. As if she was responsible for Sasuke. As if she was the one who–

**_"I walk a path no one else can take."_ **

**_"And how can I just let you walk away from the village, Sasuke-kun? What about your friends? What about me? I've done nothing but shown you love and friendship. How could you do this to me?"_ **

Ah.

It seems like she was falling back into the habit of being selfish and defensive once more.

"I'll have you know that my research will _revolutionise_ the shinobi-world—"

Danzo's sick smile at that put her off edge at once. "You say that you will impact the world, but I question if it is for the betterment of this village or simply for your own prestige."

"What are you trying to say councilman? I admit, I have my flaws and shortcomings, I am no genius. Nontheless, I try my very best in all that I do."

"Jealousy is a dangerous emotion Haruno Sakura. It is envy that sparks resent, carelessness and brashness."

_Sakura must've said something she wasn't supposed to._

"Who on earth am I supposed to envy? My lonely teammate who lost his whole clan? My friend who holds a chakra-beast inside of him and has been tormented _all his life_ for it?

"Then why on earth would you come crawling to Tsunade, begging to be mentored?"

Danzo's smile settles into one of smugness, a victorious aura radiating off the man.

"You will remember that you are a shinobi of Konoha before any other relationship or affiliation."

"And I am." Sakura's fury was reaching its peak, threatening to boil over and seize her better judgement.

Danzo smirks. "You've driven Tsunade into a tight corner. Especially with how careless you've been with your supposed revolutionary bio-chakra research."

_oh._

He pulls out a familiar research packet Sakura could've sworn was on her desk at home. "I assume you're familiar with the works of Orochimaru?"

Sakura realised she never truly knew what fear felt like before that very moment.


	4. Chapter 4

** Sakura **

She shoved the journal into its position on the shelf aggressively, a loud thud echoing throughout the library.

Angry was too vastly an understatement for how she felt at the moment. How could he dangle her life's work so precariously in front of her, taunting her with his cryptic threats?

She was afraid, confused and livid all at once.

It was as if after all these years of finally making a name for herself were finally crashing down onto her like a heavy ceiling with no pillars to support it.

She was a nobody. She was the daughter of a nobody. Yet she tried to climb the ladder that only those of great blood are capable of scaling.

She wanted to hurt him for making her feel this way. She wanted to strangle the man where he stood.

She wanted to kill him, _damn it._

But Sakura took an oath. She was a doctor, albeit now rumoured to be a murderer and suspected traitor and was also hiding illegal research under her belt, Sakura was a doctor. Doctors don't kill.

Doctors don't do what Sakura had done to the prince. Doctors wouldn't have been tempted by an opportunity like that.

But Sakura _did_ , and the councilman _knew_.

Why the hell else would he provoke her with her own research? But why her? Why not anyone else?

But nobody should've or could've possibly known. That's the biggest issue there.

' _Breathe_ ,' Sakura took a deep breath, in attempt to calm down. She reorientates herself in the room.

The lavishly decorated shelf before her was home to the personal journals of all Hokage that reined throughout Konoha's history. The First's was the thickest, no doubt engraved with even the littlest detail of how the village came to be and the end of the Warring Clans period.

The thinnest journal wasn't even a centimetre thick. Sakura pulled on the book's spine gently with her index finger before flipping through it quickly. _Odd_. The last written page wasn't even at the halfway point. She closed the journal gently, flipping to the cover page.

_'Hiruzen's journal?'_

He reined the longest, it would've been expected that his journal would have been at least comparably thick to the First's. Sakura sighed. ' _The old man was probably too busy to take the time to dictate his every decision onto paper.'_ The Third Hokage's term was arguably the most hectic one with the whole ordeal with the massive chakra demon that was sealed into her best friend when he was a baby. She wondered if Lord Third shared why it was decided that the attack would be kept secret from the children of her generation. That truly was a curious(ly badly thought out) decision.

She felt her previously burning anger subside slightly at thought of the wonderful old man. The Third Hokage was thoroughly a good man. Wise, though he may not have been the wisest, and a man of great virtue throughout his reign. He was always so patient with Naruto, even during his years as an unbearably loud child.

Sakura slipped the journal into her jacket's inner pocket, hoping to read it before bed tonight.

She smiled sadly, thinking of the fateful Chuunin exams where that wonderful man perished. She remembered Lee's nearly fatal injuries and how he wouldn't have been able to walk (even less be an able bodied nin) if it wasn't for her teacher.

Was it so bad that she wanted to heal the wounded?

Why was it illegal to do so little was reading about experiments that aimed to discover how to attain immortality and reapply it to creating a way to prevent the deaths of her comrades? She wouldn't get side tracked.

It wasn't like she craved immortality.

She didn't have any sort of burning desire to out do her best friend or the former object of her affections (now turned defector) by achieving the impossible.

Not at all.

God, she needed to know which file he took what research he was talking about _what_ _year_ _which_ _hospital_ _which_ _laboratory—_

She glanced at the wall clock. The meeting should be over by now.

Her heels clacked softly against the floorboards as she rushed to Tsunade's office.

\---

"He wants you handcuffed during the meeting." 

"W-what?" Sakura sputtered. She wasn't expecting that. Tsunade sighed in frustration, the edges of the papers in her hands crumpling in her tightening grip.

"Annually, the Daimyou visits Konoha to discuss the upcoming year's budget and new developments in the country's economy. Only high ranking shinobi are allowed to be involved in the event planning or to be stationed on guard. You recently received a letter of potential jounin promotions, you were reasonably qualified to escort one of the princes with the Hokage's strong recommendation," Tsunade explains while attempting in vain to soothe the crumpled papers back into a flat state.

Sakura bit her lip. "Did I get you into trouble?"

" _Did you get me into–?_ " Tsunade snorts with dry humour, opening the bottle of hard liquor her student brought her and taking a long swig of it. "The council is thinking of impeaching me. _Favouritism_ , they said. A chuunin with a letter of potential promotion isn't qualified for involvement in such a high ranking event."

"Then why did you assign it to me?" Sakura's voice hardens, a sour lump forming down ber throat. Tsunade remained silent.

"If you knew I wasn't legally allowed to take that job," Sakura trembles, " _why did you give it to me?_ "

"I thought nothing would go wrong," Tsunade whispers as if someone else was listening. "I thought it would look good on your file. Mark you as a prodigy or a highly trustworthy shinobi to the village."

"You did it for my _profile_?" Sakura was about to crumble from both anger and disbelief. "I'm being called a murderer! How could you do this to me?"

"I _told_ you to lay low!" Tsunade bursts, her frustration spilling over.

"And I _did_ –"

"So what was Shimura Danzo talking about? Why did he mention in the meeting, in front of the whole council, that you were in contact with Orochimaru?"

Her blood ran cold a second time that day.

"That's not true!" She burst out in a small shriek. "Tsunade-sama you know that's not true. All I did was search for original copies of his redacted files. I-I don't know what was in that file when he showed it to me. He didn't exactly tell me what he found inside and I didn't admit to anything," she stammered.

Tears clearly brimmed Tsunade's eyes as she stared into her student's pale green orbs.

"He recorded your conversation with him, Sakura," Tsunade's voice reduced into a whisper finally. "We all heard what you said."

**_"I assume you're familiar with the works of Orochimaru?"_ **

**_"Is immortality really such a sin? Is it wrong to want to preserve life? Precious life? Is it wrong to want to be a genius? Because this research will put my name up with Orochimaru's as legendary scientific minds that could offer solutions to the failures of humankind. You are a fool to stand in my way, Councilman."_ **

She didn't know when to shut her mouth, did she?

"The hearing with the Daimyou will be held in three days. You'll be handcuffed, like any other treason trial. Right now the council is deeming you guilty until proven innocent but is granting you the privilege to carry on living your daily life under close scrutiny of multiple ANBU agents. I requested for Sai to accompany you throughout the three days instead of having you locked up in a holding cell. Sound fair enough?" Tsunade explains.

Sakura simply nods, unable to even register the complete and utter mess both she and her mentor had landed themselves into.

"I know your research means everything to you, but if anyone asks you anything about it or even insults you about it before the meeting, _don't_ say a word. _Do you understand?_ "

Tsunade pulls her lips into a grim smile, resting a hand onto Sakura's shoulder comfortingly. "Go. Sai is waiting for you outside."

Sakura nods and exits the office without a word, chewing on her lower lip anxiously. Dear God, if anyone found out—

_'Which file was he holding?'_

There was no way her files could've ended up with the councilman. Her room was sealed shut with multiple layers of protection seals that could never be opened by anyone who didn't share her blood.

_Oh._

Now, she was just sad.

"Hello Ugly. I am here to escort you for three days?"Sai greets, voice void of any human emotion (as per usual). Sakura smiles shakily, punching Sai's shoulder lightly.

"Who' ya calling Ugly, stupid Sai," Sakura grumbled jokingly.

_Why was it that the blood shed in battle formed stronger bonds than the blood shared by family?_

\---

"What's all this bullshit about Sak'ra-chan bein' a murderer, 'ttebayo?" A familiar (and very annoying at times) voice calls out to the duo as they walk down the sides of the streets in the more secluded areas of town.

Sai smiles as a greeting (but his mouth moves to say–), "Well if it isn't Dic—" Naruto slams his palms onto Sai's face (missing his mouth by quite a margin) to cut him off.

"You don't have to tell everyone, damn it!" The blonde boy shrieks in horror.

Sakura let's out a small chuckle. "Well I've never seen a single thing poking out from down there. So does that mean you've got nothing downstairs?"

"Not you too! You can't see it because I'm modest. I'm a _modest_ man, 'ttebayo!" Naruto whines.

"Just when I was g'unna offer to treat y'all to Ichiraku's for early dinner too..." Naruto smirks playfully before jogging off. "Last one there pays!"

Sai shakes his head in what seemed to be endearment.

"Should we take the short cut?"

"By that do you mean let's ignore all the ANBU watching me and travel via rooftop?" Sakura giggles childishly. "Yes, let's do exactly that."

\---

"–but I started running first!"

"You took the longest possible route to travel to the stall." Sai responded before taking a long bite of noodles gracefully.

Sakura smiled, slipping the small journal from under her jacket to have a quick read of Hiruzen's journal that she temporarily looted from her teacher's library. She flipped to a random page nearer to the last few pages that had entries written onto the pages.

_ It is the Will of Fire that burns within each and everyone of us here in the Hidden Leaf. _

"Oh c'mon," Naruto slurped down half the bowl in a single breath.

_ There are some who intend to extinguish the Fire within themselves and who will go to extreme lengths to put out the Fire in all of us once and for all. _

"I didn't think you'd jump into the roofs. That's both public and private property you could've damaged!"

_ So be it we be civilian born or shinobi born. So long as we have love for our village, the Will of Fire burns brightly and indefinitely. _

"We were very cautious in our manoeuvre. I highly doubt we caused any damages."

_ Shimura Danzo has been my friend for all these years. _

Sakura leaned into her seat in interest. Completely ignoring the two who were bickering as per usual.

_ I let him establish ROOT. I always listened to his counsel. I entertained his extremist views and unreasonably harsh actions in his organisation.He was always kept as a close confidant of mine. _

"Of course you were, since you're master assassin Sai 1000. I honestly think you're a robot sometimes, 'ttebayo. Can I check you for any metal-ly stuff or android parts?"

_ I thought I could control him. I've tried to keep this journal bare to prevent my mistakes from coming back to haunt me. I've even burnt the many journals I've written for Minato and buried the remaining ones in Kushina's grave. But I believe that was the gravest decision I have made in my life time. _   
_ I fear Danzo's fire has been long extinguished. _   
_ When I told him that Jiraiya was searching for Tsunade to be my successor, he did not hesitate to show his livid disagreement. _

"That's completely absurd. But I'd be happy to prove to you what a real man looks like if you're planning to check _there_ too."

_ Danzo requested to be posted as the next Hokage instead of Tsunade. He says that there is no certainty that Jiraiya will be able to locate Tsunade soon, anyways. She's been gone for so long. And now that I am old and my body is beginning to fail me as I return to nature slowly, I fear of what Danzo intends to do to Konoha. I cannot allow him to lead my family, this home – Konoha. Not after knowing how he and Orochimaru conspired. What he did to all those innocent people. For all the mistakes I've made as Hokage, be it the Uchiha incident _ _ — _

The councilman authorised the massacre?

_ – _ _ letting Orochimaru escape, leaving Danzo to his devices– _

_ I cannot allow that man to be Hokage. _

_The councilman authorised the massacre of a clan renowned for their ocular kekkei genkai._

_Why did that sound so familiar to Sakura?_

"That's disgusting man. You know I like–" Naruto sputtered. "You know who I like! I told you I have a crush on her!"

"I still don't quite understand the concept of having a 'crush' as you call it. Do you physically compress her? Crush her bones?"

_ To whoever reads this, I beg that you do not let Danzo run amok with his violent ideals of war as I have. And you must be wary for I fear that Danzo will try to destroy you at any and all costs. His goals are dangerous and viles and cannot be realised so long as Konoha stands. _

"No, God, no! If you love her you do not crush her 'ttebayo! You gotta' be nice to her and show her you care and stuff, yanno? Like tell her she's really strong and sweet... but also really strong and could paralyse you with a single punch...but she's really beautiful..."

_ And if you Danzo, my old friend, are the hands that hold this pitiful journal, reading what I feel is going to be my last words, I must say that I am sorry to have failed you, old friend. _

"Ah, so you inform her of her qualities that she may or may not be already conscious of?"

"Ugh, why am I telling you all about this anyways 'ttebayo? Sak'ra can used to have this huuuuge crush on Sas'ke, did'cha know?"

_ For now I must attend the Chuunin Examination Finals showcase. Sadly, I am aware that I may not return from this endeavour unscathed or even alive. _

"Didn't'cha, Sak'ra-chan?" Naruto nudges Sakura's arm slightly, causing her to jump in her seat a little from fright.

"Didn't I what?"

"Have a huuuuge ass crush on Sas'ke," Naruto winked and blinked consecutively.

 _'The Councilman wants to use me to remove Lady Tsunade as Hokage,'_ Sakura thought.

She had mentioned impeachment earlier today, but was this truly just a scheme to undermine her mentor's position as Hokage?

Unease washed over Sakura. No, that couldn't be it. Everything was ringing, red flags raised –

There was something she wasn't seeing here.

"Sak'ra?"

"Huh?" Sakura snapped out of her thoughts suddenly. Naruto sighed, a small gentle smile on his lips. "Are ya' okay?"

She wanted to cry, damn it. She was such a cry baby. Why was everything so complicated?

"No. I'm not okay," Sakura inhaled sharply before throwing out whatever money was in her pocket on to the table. She stood up abruptly and squeezed Naruto's shoulder tight.

"Thanks for today. I know you're trying to cheer me up and you really did, but I really need some time right now."

Naruto nods for turning to Sai. "You make sure she's al'okay, got it?"

Sai pulled as genuine of a smile as he could muster but still ended up with more a grimace than a smile. "I'll keep her alive and physically healthy, but I unfortunately cannot promise that her mental wellbeing will recover soon."

Naruto sighs. "It's really impossible to ask for anymore than that. But really Sai. Thank you for looking out for her, 'ttebayo."

\---

_"Shizune," the blonde woman whispers, but the brunette hears her all the same. "I need you to make sure nobody sees you leave or enter the building."_

_Shizune nods, "What do you need me to do?" An invisible weight presses itself onto her stomach. She hoped this wouldn't be yet another task she'd regret._

_"Bring me Sarutobi Asuma."_

\---

She heard the sound of plates shattering as she stepped into the house. Sai's face remained indifferent to the violent nature of the sound. He wasn't sure what domestic environments typically sound like.

"Sakura? Is that you? _Is that you, you despicable child?_ " Her mother's shrill voice threatening to pierce her eardrums.

Furniture groaned loudly against the floorboard in a swift motion. "Honey, it's not even true. There's no way our girl could be a murderer. _Calm down!_ "

"Calm down?! _Look_ at her! It's as if she doesn't even live in the same house as us anymore! I don't even know what you do all day with all those shinobi. Now this?!" Mebuki screamed as her husband tried to hold the hysterical woman down.

Sakura stood there blankly, thoroughly drained of emotion for the day. Kizashi Haruno looked into his daughter's cold eyes desperately as he held onto his wife.

"It's not true, right Sakura dear?" Kizashi almost pleaded.

Sakura looked away.

Kizashi sighed in disappointment.

Mebuki threw both sandals off her feet towards Sakura's direction. One at Sai and one at Sakura. 

"I didn't kill him, but I'm guilty until proven innocent. It happened deep into the forests so I don't think there'll be any evidence to prove me innocent." Sakura explained dryly.

Mebuki gasps for air, recovering from her outburst of fury, now in disbelief. "People actually spat on me today. Said I raised my girl to be a murderer. But I said I raised my girl to be kind and gentle. I said she was a doctor. You know what they said to that, Sakura?" Mebuki didn't wait for an answer to her rhetoric.

"They said all shinobi are killers by nature. They're only labelled as murderers once they've killed the wrong person." Mebuki sobbed into her wrist as Kizashi attempted to console her silently.

"How many have you killed, my girl? How about your friends?" Mebuki stares at Sai, causing the pale boy to grow uncomfortable at the gaze.

Sai sharply turns to Sakura. "I'll head into your room and wait for this personal engagement to conclude before I continue to escort you."

Sakura scoffs. "Saying escort makes it sound like I'm not being accused for murder." She nods anyways, "Gimme' twenty minutes." Sai nods in return before walking away swiftly towards the room that Sakura often brought him and Naruto into whenever she invited them over.

"The authorities came over to search the house. They asked for us to sign in blood in documents to prove that we're your biological parents and not some fake parents while you run amok as a serial killer of sorts," Kizashi explains.

"And you believed them? You gave them your blood?" Sakura questions in disbelief.

Kizashi's face drops into a pale and confused state. "I complied with the authorities, Sakura. Did I do something wrong?"

"You're not supposed to hand over your raw DNA to just anybody who demands for it." Sakura sighs, dragging a chair for her to sit by the dining table, urging her parents to sit down with her.

"What's wrong? What did they do with the blood?" Her mother asks warily.

"They stole some classified research files from me. I sealed it in a way that it could only be opened by my own blood or blood that shared similar DNA to mine. These are file that, read out of context, will call for my execution."

Her parents paled at her words. "Then can't you explain the context? Can't you just tell them you were reading and writing stuff before it was complete? And that everything is a big misunderstanding?"

Sakura shook her head, causing her mother to sob heavier and her father to cringe in distress.

"If it's about a few files, then why are they calling you a murderer? What about the Fire prince?" Kizashi questions, desperate for at least some good news.

"The media is calling it a murder, but the actual incoming charge is suspected treason. It's a separate case altogether," Sakura chuckles humourlessly. "But with the files, they have all the more reason to banish or execute me and remove Lady Hokage from office."

"The Hokage? Dear God, Sakura my girl, what have you gotten yourself into?" Kizashi gapes.

Mebuki sniffs unsteadily and holds Sakura's hands in her own. "What can we do to help? You can tell them that you're from a purely civilian background. Say that you're not some power hungry maniac from a big clan. Is there any damages you need to pay for or–?"

"Mom," Sakura trembles, tears threatening to spill. "The best thing you and Dad can do for me right now is move out of Konoha."

"What? And abandon home? Everything we've spent our lives building?" Kizashi and Mebuki worriedly share glances.

 _'Don't cry.'_ Sakura thought. ' _You don't deserve to cry after all you've done.'_

"At least for a few months, please. Until my name is cleared, or until they decide to–" Sakura gasps for breath, really trying to control her breathing. She couldn't cry. She had to be strong. She didn't deserve to cry.

Something didn't feel right. She needed to make sure.

Hiruzen's journal triggered a forgotten memory within her. A research report she stumbled across among the pile that she should not have been reading.

"Alright," Kizashi says, one hand comforting his wife and the other rested on his daughters palm in a tight squeeze. "I think..." the teenager grimaces, a gut feeling driving her. "I think there's a bad man after me," Sakura whispers, "I can't let him get to you once he's done with me."

"I'll withdraw all the money in my bank for you. I'll ask Shizune to help me make sure you're completely untraceable. We'll get living arrangements done, so don't worry about me," Sakura offered a reassuring smile.

"You just need to go now and everything will be fine." 


	5. Chapter 5

** Kakashi **

The breeze was good today. A good day for a lazy stroll around Konoha. He needed to catch up on news and gossip going around town anyways. Book in hand, hair gelled back into his signature spikes, Kakashi steps out of his dull abode.

The civilian districts are lively as always, a sharp contrast to the chilling silence back in the shinobi districts. That was, of course, to be expected given the fact that shinobis generally weren't the bubbly bright kind of people you'd meet on the streets.

Exactly that made people like Naruto such an enigma among nins. The blonde boy was as endearing as one gets, full of optimism, happiness and energy.

_Kakashi would never forget that day– grief-stricken, eyes devoid of hope as they usually were._

That day he vowed to do everything in his ability to restore Team 7. He would help Naruto bring back that happiness that was stolen from them.

Kakashi misses _him_.

He blinks a little longer than he would naturally, clearing his mind of _him_. Today was a rare lazy day for Kakashi to relax and take it easy.

This was the only way he knew how to cope with it all.

The silver-haired jounin saunters down a relatively empty street leading towards the main market, a distinct pink catching his eye. A faint smile under his mask, he continues a leisurely pace towards his pink-haired student.

 _"...C'mon Sakura, don't be over dramatic! Nobody's really trying to suffocating you here. In fact, I'm sure this whole thing will blow over by next week."_ Kakashi hears a familiar voice as he approaches his student.

The Yamanaka girl, one of Asuma's. What was her name again? Ino?

_"I don't think this is a good time, Ino. What if–"_

" _Aa, aa, aa!"_ the platinum blondeinterrupted. _"No what ifs! There's no harm in bringing you here, Forehead. I don't see what's the big commotion about here."_

Kakashi narrowly misses the two kunoichi as Ino drags Sakura off into the next street over. Was Sakura upset over something? He wasn't surprised but he made a mental note to say something to lift the girl's spirits the next time he bumped into her.

Eventually reaching the market centre, Kakashi is met with a rather peculiar scene.

"Was it that pink-haired kunoichi that passed by earlier? I can't believe I've been selling my fruits to her!" A fruit vendor and a villager conversed in hushed tones.

A group of chuunin loitering about, whispering a name very familiar to Kakashi.

What's going on with Sakura?

Maybe he should've walked a little faster to catch up to the girl earlier on. But then again, this was Haruno Sakura people are talking about. What could possibly be so wrong, right?

"Hey," Kakashi approaches the chuunin, four of them clustered together as they smoked. At once they stood at attention, recognising Kakashi immediately. "What's the word about Haruno Sakura going around?"

One of them cast a confused gaze at the silver-haired man. "Forgive me for being rude, Hatake-san, but you've seriously not heard about the news on Doctor Haruno?"

Huh. Kakashi didn't know Sakura was a doctor. Wasn't she too young to be a doctor?

"Maa, I've been cooped up for a while. Haven't heard much news around the village recently."

"Oh, wow," the chuunin breathes, "It's the biggest news right now. Haruno Sakura's being accused for treason and for murdering the second Fire Prince,"

What?

"She came in yesterday drenched in blood from her escort mission and the prince she was escorting was declared dead in the hospital."

Kakashi suppresses his shock. "Well...that doesn't necessarily mean that she murdered him, now does it?"

The chuunin shrugs. "That's just what the press is saying. I'm not the one claiming that she did it or not." Kakashi sighs out a thanks, hand raised in acknowledgment as he walks away from the group.

He couldn't have one uneventful lazy day, could he?

'It's all probably just a one over exaggerated misunderstanding,' he though to himself. Besides, even that Ino girl said that the attention on his pinkette student would blow over by next week. The girl shouldn't be too affected by the false headlines.

Accidents happen.

He couldn't blame Sakura for slipping up. Someone should've been there to support her during such a high profile mission. It wasn't the girl's fault that the mission was poorly assigned.

From a distance, Kakashi spots another distinctive colour. A bright, obnoxious orange and black jacket beckoned Kakashi to break out into a small jog to meet the blonde boy.

"I'm tellin' ya, there's no way Sak'ra-chan intentionally killed the guy! She's a doctor, so she took that oath thing to protect human life," Naruto's fists were balled tightly, seething anger dripping off his tongue.

The villager rolls his eyes and places an accusatory finger rudely to the blonde's face. "What would you know, demon vermin? You shinobi are in the business of murder! Who's not to say that she didn't kill 'im? Huh?"

Naruto'a face falls slightly at the derogatory remark but quickly recovers his fury on behalf of his comrade.

"Well, you have my word that she didn't do it, ttebato! Doc' Haruno's an honest shinobi. She's got all her morals lined up, so don't degrade Sak'ra when you don't even know her yer'self!"

"Your word means shit, boy!"

Kakashi decides that it was about the right time he stepped in to diffuse the argument.

"Let's all calm down and stop yelling, hmm?" Kakashi places a gentle but firm hand to the blonde's back, urging the boy to step away from the scene.

Naruto instead turns to his teacher, a horrified expression on his whiskered face.

"This bastard is slandering Sak'ra-chan, sensei! You can't possibly be okay with this!?" The blonde exclaims in disbelief.

Kakashi shakes his head, patting Naruto on the shoulder. "Sakura would be happy to hear that you're standing up for her, Naruto, but I'm sure she wouldn't like to hear that you caused a racket in the market unnecessarily."

To satisfy his student in his over-emotional state, Kakashi sends a sharp glare towards the villager who visibly recoils in fear. "There's no need to say anything more since she's clearly innocent."

The crowd disperses and the villager scurries away, curses muttered under his breath.

"Sensei,"

Kakashi's gazed snapped immediately to his student's sad, blue eyes.

"She'll be alright, won't she?" There it was. That boyish look of hope and naivety that pleaded with Kakashi to just say yes.

"Of course she will." He says.

He had no reason to believe otherwise.

Naruto inhales shakily (no doubt worried for his friend, but Kakashi simply just didn't see the urgency in worrying over fake news?) and slaps his cheeks harshly. He wills himself to put on a smile for his teacher even though that sadness in his eyes never quite go away.

Kakashi couldn't bear to see the boy melancholy.

"I'm headin' over to the Hokage building to meet Sak'ra. You wanna come with, Kakashi-sensei?" The blonde says, finally regaining his usual cheery demeanour. (Even if it was simply a facade, Kakashi was grateful that the boy didn't continue to plague his emotions with that sad frown)

Just a frown was enough to remind Kakashi of _him_.

Of his one failure as a teacher.

_What could've made him stay?_

Kakashi shook his head. "You head on without me. I'll catch up to you if I'm free later on," he swept a hand over his silvered locks, a small pained smile visible under the opaque fabric.

Naruto nods, hand gesturing a wave as he jogs away towards the Hokage building, the loose ends of fabric of his forehead protector swaying with the wind like a tail.

Kakashi turns in the opposite direction headed for the memorial stone on the other side of the village.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please over analyse the behaviour of the characters i put in effort to show their thoughts and emotions into their actions :(( either that or i just suck at it lol


	6. Chapter 6

** Sakura **

The final night before Sakura's hearing, the pinkette stumbles into the Hokage office with a thin and aged journal shaky in her grasp. Her mouth tasted strongly of mint.

Tsunade sighed, anger prickling at the sight of her student. "You're late. Where have you been these last few days? Do you even care-"

Sakura dared to send a sharp glare to her mentor, sucking in sharp breaths through her teeth as she tried her god-damned best not to yell at the blonde woman. Or cry. Perhaps both. She didn't know what she felt anymore, but she knew exhaustion. A bitter friend that stuck to her like a shadow.

The light was getting brighter everyday.

"Sorry about that," melancholy had drained every ounce of politeness from her over the last two days. "I was working some things out with Shizune."

"And what could possibly be more important than putting together your murder-treason-illegal research case for tomorrow's hearing? Goofing off, spending precious time with Naruto and Sai before you're locked up or dead?" Tsunade snarkily snaps at the teenager. Sakura scoffs at her mentor as she fixes her posture and walks towards the desk.

_was she really going to berate her despite the fact that she was the cause of all this?_

"My _parents_ ," she gritted her teeth. "I wanted to make sure they moved out of the village by tonight just in case anything goes - _well_ \- more south."

Sakura adds with a tired fire in her eyes, "Apparently Mom has relatives in Kiri. I've been trying to get safe passage for them to migrate there. Lee and his team were surprisingly willing to do me a favor and make sure my parents reach Kiri in one piece."

Tsunade's lips dip into a frown. "I didn't approve any out going missions for team Gai."

Sakura sighed, fingers tracing mindless patterns on the soft leather of the book. "Yeah well you've given me and Shizune plenty of practice forging your signature. Figured one more wouldn't hurt."

_had she read the journal?_

"What's that?" A deep voice rumbled from the left.

"Holy shit!" Sakura jumped in shock, hands immediately reaching for the kunai strapped to her back. She relaxed once she saw the carbon-ash locks and the familiar face that accompanied it. "Asuma-san? I didn't even realise you were in the room." She muttered.

"I don't blame you, honestly. You look dead," Asuma replies. Sakura flinches at his word choice but doesn't comment on it. "Lady Hokage and I have been putting together a defense case for you." He points at the mess of documents and files at decorates the usual pig sty of papers surrounding the Hokage's desk.

"No offence Asuma-san, but shouldn't I get an attorney? A merciful pro-bono lawyer? I mean, you're a genin sensei."

Asuma rubs the back of his neck, fiddling with an unlit cigarette between his fingers. "None taken. Funny story actually," Asuma glances at Tsunade, "the council forbade any lawyers from taking up your case."

"What?"

Tsunade taps her manicured nails on her desk rhythmically. "Remember the recording?" Sakura nodded.

"The three old geezers decided that giving you a lawyer would 'conceal the truth' during the trial and would allow you to 'wriggle away like a satisfied leech' because you're my student," Tsunade huffed.

"Another thing they want to add to my impeachment case, if you were wondering."

The pink-haired teen scoffed at that, "So nothing out of the expected then. You, covering your own ass, as per usual."

Asuma cringes at her comment. " _Language_. You're in a formal meeting with the Hokage."

"I'm sitting across the person that started all this, there's a difference, Asuma-san."

Sakura sighed deeply, rubbing her palms across her face. "Look, I'm sorry for being rude. I'm just–" her eyes glanced at the messy desk her mentor sat behind, "I'm so tired. I just want everything to go back to the way it was."

She flips Hiruzen's journal onto the heaps of paper, landing with a soft slap.

"What's the old man's journal got to do with this?" Tsunade asks, voice droning grey. Asuma curiously traces the soft leather with his index finger, lost in a sudden trance.

Surely, thinking of his dead father.

_if she knew, she would've done something, wouldn't she?_

"I found it odd that the Third's journal was so short compared to any other hokage's since he held the longest office. I read through it and found a warning about the Councilman Shimura. And a little more." Sakura flipped to a page where she had folded in a small dog ear at the paper's corner.

Asuma gingerly held the book in his hand, eyes speeding through his father's writing. His lips dipped into a sour frown.

"Are you even legally allowed to be in possession of this?" He asks.

Sakura directs a bitter smile at her mentor before replying, "Nope," she pops the consonant off her lips. "It's just that my mentor has been bending the law around to suit my learning needs for the past few years."

Tsunade groans, "Not the time." Sakura gives her a look.

Asuma combs a hand through his greyish-black locks. "You really need to stop with the illegal books. Like - anything to do with paper that is illegal."

"I would've stopped if someone had told me that I was acting as a shadow Hokage whenever I went through paperwork and looked through her restricted library for confidential information that she needed for her next meeting."

Tsunade returns Sakura's stern look which the teenager merely shrugged off. "Yes, I've been an irresponsible Hokage. Are you done gloating?"

"Considering how you got me into this mess, I don't think I'll ever be done gloating – sorry. I don't have the energy to be polite or think about your feelings about this,"

Asuma groans a second time within the span of a couple of minutes. "Shit," he laid the journal down for Tsunade to read for herself. "So Shimura Danzo ordered the Uchiha Massacre and my dad _covered it up_?" A look of betrayal washes across the man's face.

"He and Orochimaru were in cahoots for a period of time? If we weren't in deep shit before, we sure as hell are now."

Tsunade nods, "I've read it." Asuma squints his eyes in disbelief. "And you've never tried to set things right? Tried to arrest him? Shut down ROOT? You even asked how _this is related?"_ He sighs as Tsunade breaks her gaze from either two in the room. "Right, got it, not the time to discuss this, apologies Lady Hokage."

_sakura knew the feeling of having a teacher who didn't really care about you. if you failed, if you were the best, if you were accused for treason–_

_but now she knew a teacher who cared too much about her and too little about everything around her_

**"You did this for my portfolio?"**

**"I didn't think anything would go wrong!"**

**_"Sakura, I would do anything for you. For Shizune. You two are what truly matters."_ **

**_"What about Naruto? He's your godchild, isn't he? Grandson?" A much younger Sakura asks, hair long enough to touch her shoulders. Eyes round and bright with precious remnants of childlike naivety after all the events of the year and a half before this._ **

**_"I know it seems pretentious to say –," Tsunade chuckles. "But you're like my own daughter. My apprentice. I want to watch you grow and succeed. Naruto? I'd gladly be the to support him when he needs it, just like I promised. But I want to be there for you, always. Even when the day comes that you say you don't need me anymore, I will always be there for you, Sakura."_ **

**_"You're stuck with me now, kid." Tsunade snickered, white wine in hand._ **

"You didn't answer my question, Asuma-san," Sakura brings Asuma out of his distractions. "Why you? Not that I'm ungrateful for all that you're doing for me," she breaks a small smile for the older man. "Thank you, by the way."

Asuma shook his head, "Don't thank me yet, kid. You can save your gratitude for when we set all this right."

"You see, I was once part of a group called the Twelve Guardian nins. We protect the Daimyou and act as his primary guard unit,"

He lightly grips aged the grey loincloth around his waist, a red kanji for 'fire' enclosed within a circle of the same grey shade.

**_Sakura had met another man with a sash just like that. That same day._ **

"Hopefully, as a former guardian, the son of the late Third Hokage and the current head of clan Sarutobi – I'll be able to persuade the Daimyou and council more easily than anyone else."

"But don't expect the council or the Daimyou to fall for our cheap trick." Tsunade remarks.

Asuma nods in agreement, "That's why we need a solid defense for you."

The teenager hums in response. "With new amendments, I'm assuming?" She motions to the aged leather journal on the desk.

"Well, we can't accuse Shimura-san of anything since this is your trial. Can we?" Asuma turns to Tsunade, questioning.

"Possible – but it's a rather shaky argument. We don't have proof of him conspiring with Orochimaru or his orders to massacre the Uchiha." The blonde says.

Sakura bites her lip the moment she felt her mouth move to say something. Her stomach drops at her mentor's words. Not out of disappointment, but out of disgust for herself.

Because she knew where to get the evidence.

_And she actually had considered it for a whole second._

Tsunade and Sakura lock eyes for the briefest of moments. A split second conversation. No matter how desperate Sakura was, no matter how upset she was with her mentor, they both had similar morals and beliefs at the end of the day. It's what a teacher imparts to her student, naturally.

She never had to worry about Sakura digging up _graves_ in the pitch black night.

"So then, back to the original discussion. You're being charged for suspected treason due to alleged murder of the Fire Country's second prince. Good news is I received the autopsy results today," Tsunade shifts a manilla folder on her right, placing it in front of her apprentice.

"Evidence of Haruno Sakura's chakra all across his bloodstream. All healing-type chakra," Tsunade gives a small nod as Sakura's eyes shine with a splinter of hope.

"That'd definitely clear you of the murder charge. Maybe give you an award for trying to save him till the very end," Asuma comments, dry with sarcasm.

"That would've been clear proof that you didn't commit treason but then there's – "

"The _fucking_ recording," Tsunade interjects bitterly.

Asuma nods. "Public prosecution's case is likely to be based around the theory that you harvested his – what is that? His heart?" Asuma peeks into the folder, revealing a rather grotesque photograph annotated with notes from the morgue. _His face_ , Sakura remembered his face.

She remembered the blood that kept pouring and pouring and pouring out of his chest. How much could a person bleed?

Well, the average adult had 4.5 to 5.5 litres of blood in their body and losing 40% was a sealed death. That was about 2 litres? What did 2 litres of pure red look like on her hands? Dyeing the fibers of her clothes? Staining her skin? Plaguing her nightmares?

"Yeah - his heart. Clean cuts to the arteries, almost as if there's was surgical removal of the heart. And since you're a doctor – no," Asuma retracts, "you're no heart surgeon, but you're a researcher, so it'll all add up on their side." Asuma continues.

"Except for the hard evidence. This is all based on speculation, so they can't link my research to organ harvesting. Even if they do, I'll know that its fake. My logs and trackers would be more than enough to debunk that."

_but she didn't know which file the councilman had held_

"Can you retrieve the logs?" Tsunade asks. "Not by tomorrow. Too much excess data to sift through." The pinkette responds in a heartbeat.

The blonde clicks her tongue, indicating her irritation. Asuma shrugs. "Shouldn't be an issue. We can bring it up as evidence and request for an adjournment to retrieve more evidence. I doubt the case will be settled in a single hearing."

Nonetheless, Sakura silently wished that the hearing would be over as soon as possible. She could already imagine the cold chains of handcuffs around her wrists, not because they restrained her - she had seen enough of her mentor's daily paperwork to know that those accused for treason were never restrained by chakra-induced cuffs. The metal was yet another test of loyalty but Sakura felt it was a form of mockery more than anything. Taunting.

You could break out of them, but you'd be proving yourself guilty.

You could shatter them with a small tug, but the whole room was filled with at least a dozen of the strongest shinobi in Konoha. Why was she even thinking about breaking out of these cuffs, anyways? She was innocent. As long as she maintained her truthful position to the very end, she'd walk free. Then she remembered an aged gaze hiding something sinister, bandages wrapped extensively around an entire arm, hiding it - _hiding them._

There was no proof that she knew but clearly the fact that she was even in this situation screamed that _he knew that she knows_.

Sakura fiddles with the crumpled cloth of her skirt, eyes faraway in thought. "If they _really_ read my research, they would know that I've never considered any experimentation with organs and body augmentation."

_her desk was ransacked, left bare._

Tsunade nods, a smug smirk on her face. "And if we ask why they concluded that you experiment with organs, we can jump Danzo with the conspiracy."

She felt like a fly caught in a spider's web, watching as her mentor flew around the intricate, sticky silk lines. Who was to say this wasn't just one grand, magnificent scheme?

Sakura dared to match her mentor's smirk, looking more like a sad, resigned smile than an arrogant expression . Her throat was still sore from earlier on at home but she could feel it again. Bile rising up and up _up up up -_

_...breathe!_

"Orochimaru did a few organ-related experiments. He even transplanted new limbs onto," they hadn't noticed her voice waiver, "an _anonymous_ patient while he was in Konoha," Sakura said. "I've read the redacted files but I've never conducted any research or projects related to that field."

Asuma sighs, "I can't even be mad at your illegal paper adventures right now. That's a a good counter. They've got their own holes to deal with." Asuma allows a small look of relief on his face. "Maybe we're not all that screwed," he says as he gathers the autopsy results and the scattered papers, neatly filing them into a large red binder file.

_knowledge was truly the most dangerous commodity_

Sakura laughs dryly. "Honestly, Tsunade-sama. I think Shimura-san is simply just milking this trial to build up that impeachment against you,"

_and to get rid of me._

"Ugh, I hate those old geezers." Tsunade groaned, reaching under her table for a bottle that she hid away from Shizune's dissaproving eyes. Tsunade pours a cup each for the two in the room, "for good luck," she offers with a distasteful frown. Sakura takes a slow sip, feeling the alcohol down her gullet. Perhaps she had hoped that the drink would wash down the feeling of defeat that she felt then. After all, this could just be her anxiety playing tricks on her too-sober mind.

When she swallows the last of the drink, she bitterly notes that the strong feeling still remained.

\---

_There was a rustling in the trees, too aggressive to simply another gust of wind._

_"Your highness, I have a feeling that we're being followed," the young girl says, bright emerald eyes fearfully scanning the dense forestry surrounding the two of them. A nervous habit she picked up when she started going on solo missions without Kakashi-sensei to guide her and Naruto or him to protect her._

i can do this! i just need to have a little more confidence in myself

_The man dismisses her remark, a wave of a hand protruding out of the small window of the royal carriage. "Its just a wind, child. Keep moving, men!" The prince beckons the two servants carrying the norimono carriage on their shoulders._

_The young kunoichi fumbles at the prince's dismissal, opting to remain silent as they travelled towards Konoha. They were so close, a little more than an hour away! She was sure nothing would happen between the distance from here to the gates of sweet home._

_Then a deep, sinister energy sent goosebumps all over her skin._

_She hastens her pace, walking alongside the frontman. "Sir," she begins to plead. "I can sense a large chakra signature -"_

_"Sazurai-chan. Be a good little girl and just walk quietly, could you? Keep looking pretty and dainty, just like that. It's probably nothing." The prince orders, an irritated growl to his voice. "Damn Hokage, sending children to escort me. Who's being escorted, me or her?!" The prince grumbles under his breath from the inside of his carriage._

my name is sakura

_But she couldn't find her voice to correct the man in the carriage who held an immense political leverage over her home town. She couldn't risk disappointing Tsunade-sama like that._

_So she took a deep breath and muttered a prayer._

\---

"So we'll bring up your age firstly and how you're studing under a Sannin." Asuma states. "You're still a minor, contrary to popular belief that genins can do whatever the hell they want."

Tsunade rolls her eyes at that, groaning at the thought of a certain whiskered boy, before adding, "Understandably your subject of study would be far more advanced than typical nin resources would provide for." Tsunade sips on the last bit of her alcohol, still relatively sober by the grace of God, Sakura thinks. They've spent hours in the office, at this point they were basking in self-made mockery of Sakura's situation.

"We're going to be arguing that you should have a status of prodigy and all of your research is the result of a mind of great prowess being suppressed by regular Konohan laws." Tsunade adds, earning a scoff from the teenager. "Me, a prodigy." Sakura laughs humourlessly. "How are you going to justify that claim, Tsunade-sama?"

"Your genin team of course," she responds. "Both of them geniuses in their own right, stated in their files from the very beginning. Every team is put together with a purpose, after all." Ouch. That stung Sakura, especially coming from her own mentor.

Because she was no genius.

Tsunade's loosened mood allowed for her to break out into a cheeky smile. "We'll shove your intelligence up their asses the moment they bring out the whole civilian-born bullshit, understand?" The blonde cackles.

Asuma puffs on his recently lighted cigarette, Sakura coughing and swatting the air everytime the smoke crawls too close to her nose.

"Drop a science fun fact. That'll spur them on," Asuma snickers along with the blonde.

Sakura mocks a look of disgust. "Ignorance! My life's work is studying chakra and relationships between chakra and biology, you old baffoon!"

"That's why you're the youngest doctor in Konoha General Hospital within the last decade over! See? Prodigy material!" Tsunade reels them back into the original topic.

"Kakashi wasn't wrong when he said I was a bookish kunoichi,"

The laid back energy in the room allowed Sakura the freedom of loose lips for one last night.

"I wonder what his face will look like when he hears people call me the next Orochimaru,"

—-

** Prince - 4 Days Ago; **

The transport men were fell to the ground at about the same instance.

The carriage tipped and crashed onto the ground harshly, a sharp yelp emitted from the interior. "You fools! What could possibly have gone wrong now?" The prince peels the window open with an annoyed huff. He tilts his head out of the carriage, "Well? What are you waiting for -?" The prince's breath is caught in his throat when we spots the lifeless transport men on the earth, staining the soil with a dark tint as they bled.

A strong grip pulls him out of the carriage and he is met with pale emerald eyes of his child-bodyguard. "Can you use chakra to run?" She asks, her voice no longer held the timidness she had been using whenever she addressed him these past two days of travelling.

"Wh-What?" He may be a prince, but in the face of death he was but a man.

The girl pulled him as they broke into a run. "Chakra. Run." She demanded as her eyes swept across the greenery before them - searching for something the man could not detect in the slightest. _"Well?"_ Her voice squeaked in panic as her running pace hastened. Coming to his senses, the prince pumps the foreign energy to his legs, uncomfortable from its rare usage.

"Yes!" He manages to reply as the girl points upwards to the thick appendages of the dense forestry she led them towards. "Thank God," he hears the child mutter before instructing, "We're going to jump and run under the tree's cover."

The child's grip tightened on his arm but he didn't dare squirm away from what he knew was his lifeline.

"One, two..." she tugged his arm upwards as he dared to leap with his unevenly chakra-enhanced limbs, "...three!" He held his breath as they were airborne, fumbling with the landing. His ankle bent at an alarming angle, pain screaming at him demanding for the girl to slow down or let him rest. He knew they couldn't -

And the child was ready to steady him and maintain their fleeing pace.

He thought to mutter a prayer to the deities and Gods that were willing to listen. He had never felt so utterly terrified in his lifetime as he felt in this moment. "Sazurai-chan," the prince puffs out her name, unable to catch his breath at the intensive physical exertion. "Where are we running to?"

He trips on his long robe.

He lets out a loud scream. His fall drags Sakura down with him but the girl manages to lift him up with relative ease, carrying him bridal-style as she lands gracefully on the ground and continues running. She was running at a slower pace with the added weight but she managed to keep at a consistent run nonetheless.

The pink-haired girl didn't look even the slightest bit exhausted. "Konoha," she said, her voice unwavering despite the maneuver she had just completed. "- and I didn't want to correct you, but my name's Sakura."

A condescending laugh escapes his throat naturally at her words. How could she say such a thing when his life was in danger? Was this child stupid?

Sakura continues running for a good few minutes, not slowing even when he suggests to her that they had outran the attacker.

Then a dark tendril shoots through the air, scraping the girl's right shin mid-air.

She does not falter but her expression of horror was enough to silence the prince's egotistical thoughts. Perhaps, even if she was a child, his savior deserved to be addressed respectfully. The girl curses like a mantra as she ran, the prince represses the stray thought that children her age shouldn't be familiar with such foul language.

"Damn it, keep quiet. Unless you want them to find us." She says as she breaks her path, running in a seemingly haphazard pattern around the forestry. He guesses that she was trying to lose the attacker pursuing them.

An ear-splitting screech fills the air.

He could only watch as Sakura loses grip on his body from sheer inertia, her body forcibly yanked from his own as the most hideous black creature pulls her away by her ankles.

The girl is thrown by the creature, slammed into a nearby tree trunk like a ragdoll. She remains conscious and desperately rushes to get back onto her feet. The creature and the girl engage in battle, leaving the prince to cower on the ground, unable to assist the shinobi.

" **Hmm** ," a deep voice rumbles behind him. His blood ran cold, a cruel shiver down his spine. " **What a shame. I had hoped you'd be a decent harvest. Maybe I'll take the girl instead.** " The prince shook violently, turning to meet the masked face of their attacker, pupil-less eyes haunting him.

" **A royal heart** ," the attacker chuckled darkly, lips shifting under his mask. " **A worthless trophy.** "

He felt the earth shake as violently as he was, the attacker shifting his balance as the ground began to crack not far from them.

_The girl had split the ground with her bare fists!_

The attacker gazes upon the girl who was now rushing towards the prince, the creature trapped temporarily in the deep crevices she created in the hard soil. " **I had hoped to collect a pretty bounty off your corpse. But perhaps I'll keep you as a cheap souvenir instead.** "The masked man hums in thought as black tendrils wrap around the prince. " **After all, the young one seems familiar.** "

The prince gasped, white noise filling his ears. The sound of the young girl's scream deaf to the Fire Country's prince as the black threads pierce his core and snaps back towards its master in the blink of an eye. The prince's gaze blurs as he watches the masked man saunter away, disappearing into the dense, eerie green.

He felts the wind on his face and eventually the ground on his back.

He felt the smallest indication of pressure on his gaping chest as energy faintly pulses through his body. Then, he gazes up into pale green eyes, frightened as a child should be. He felt a wave of guilt suddenly, realizing that this was no ordinary frightened child. She was a young shinobi who was watching a man die in her arms.

He had never been a good man.

He was arrogant all his life. Always eyeing the throne his uncle sat on. Envying his cousin who was born first in line to the throne he craved for - even though his cousin was born second to him. He had been a cruel master to his servants, a difficult man to those that we responsible for protecting his life with their own.

He felt the shaking hands of the girl kneeling by his side, desperately salvaging what was left of his draining life force. "Forget it," he croaks. The girl whispers something but he was too lightheaded to hear it. "I would never have been King in this lifetime anyways."

Finally, he felt nothing.

The pinkette strangely felt no remorse for his death. Instead, she focuses on the green hue around her hands and thinks of the teacher who would surely be disappointed in her. For a moment she takes her hands away from the dead man's chest and sits in a contemplative silence.

For a moment, her fingers move to grasp a scroll and a small tube, hesitating. She took an oath, hadn't she? She was a doctor –

She plucks off a few strands of hair and collects a tiny sample of blood and seals in into the scroll. She tucks the scroll back into its snug position above her weapons pouch, swearing some blood on her hands onto the fabric to draw attention away from the scroll.

"Act like one, damn it."

She then continues pumping healing chakra into the corpse, fingers trembling, until a group of Leaf shinobi finds her bent over the prince's unmoving body in near complete exhaustion hours later.

\---

Sakura forces a smile as she listens to Tsunade throw curses and crude jokes about the council, bantering ever so often with Asuma and herself, although she decreasingly reciprocate with any of her usual witty remarks.

Her hands move over her weapon pouch, feeling for the scroll on her thigh. She slips it out of its holder, subtly shoving it into the very bottom of the bag. She leans over her mentor's desk, feigning attention to the case file left open. Unclipping the pouch with one hand, Sakura slips it into the Hokage's bottom desk drawer.

Even if she hadn't experimented, she had still read the reports. Whichever file he had held - be it her own journal papers, readings, references or one of the many snake sage-related reports - there was no promise that she had never dabbled even a sentence into forbidden studies.

Mortality was an inevitability of the human condition. If one could resurrect, perhaps remove mortality from the equation altogether - how many could be saved?

At first she thought of the dead family of her cold, broken first love, then she thought of friends caught in the brink of war and their Hokage who died to seal evil's arms. Some where along the way, she started thinking more of impressing a teacher who never looked her way.

Of everyone who thought lowly of her.

This made her think - _about enhancing mortality_ \- of controlling life and death. Wouldn't that achieve all of her goals? Helping people, impressing people? And then she didn't. She felt different now. A shift in her resolve.

Finally she thought of monsters.

A curious, unpredictable mind was far more dangerous than a ruthless warrior.


	7. Chapter 7

** Sai - Yesterday **

Sai was told to keep a close eye on his teammate during the days leading up to the trial.

He followed her everywhere. He slept in the guest room of her home and ate with her. He had helped her parents prepare for the move and avoided conversation with them wherever possible.

(Not that Kizashi or Mebuki we're particularly in the mood for conversation.)

A comfortable silence grew between Sakura and Sai as they went about the day.

He was grateful for the lack of idle chatter, knowing that he'd never quite read anything to prepare him for a situation like this. He had read a decent amount on comforting persons in distress, but Sakura wasn't visibly in distress as the texts had prescribed. She wasn't hyperventilating, screaming or crying.

Sakura was simply silent.

(Deep down, Sai felt the unease knowing that his comrade was never the quiet type. Even in anguish, even when the topic of the boy Sai served as replacement for came up, Sakura was always one to be vocal of her thoughts.)

Today, he accompanied her to the village gates to see her parents off. He stood by her side as a silent support for the pinkette.

"Lee," Sakura grasped the green spandex-clad boy by the wrist. The three other nins turn, patiently awaiting for their comrade before they started their journey to Kiri. "Tenten, Neji-san, Gai-sensei," Sai notes the sound of the pinkette's gloves shifting, indicating the tightening in her grip.

"Thank you," Her face was expressionless, "I'll never forget what you've done for me." Yet her emerald eyes glistened with tears that Sai knew she would shed in her sleep.

(Deep down, Sai was aware of his heart clenching at the sound of her soft cries at night. He couldn't admit that, though because he was supposed to be the socially inept one on the team. He couldn't let anyone know how that he _felt_. Besides he would always be second to–)

Tenten shook her head with a gentle smile. "We believe in you, Sakura. If this gives you a peace of mind throughout this whole fiasco, I'd gladly do it." Neji grunts but Sai couldn't tell if it was his way of agreeing with the brunette or if he meant for it to be a scoff of disapproval.

Unlike the loud theatrics Sai had witnessed previously from the man, Gai uncharacteristically adjusts the bag in his hand without a word, choosing to focus on the silent Mebuki and Hizashi Haruno who stared at their only child with despair. Sai mentally notes the anomaly in the oldest shinobi's behaviour.

"Just you wait, o' Youthful Sakura! You'll be proven innocent, I'm sure of it. We'll see you once more when we return, so fret not!" Lee's smile was always shining with that infectious positivity of his. Eyes, determined and hopeful, yet he had left Sakura indifferent when she'd usually be jumping at Lee's words of encouragement.

She smiles, hands now in a firm handshake with the round eyed boy.

"Thank you, Lee. Goodbye."

(Somewhere inside all of them, they felt a thread fall limp, severed cleanly.)

Sai stands by her as Sakura watched her parents brisk walk away from the gates, waiting and watching until their backs had faded into the distance.

(He fights the urge to wrap his arm around her and assure her that she would see them soon.)

(He remembers bloodied soil and violet locks. He remembers a book that mentioned how lying was not appreciated in society.)

\---

Team Gai walked in a solemn silence, Sakura's parents wordless since the start of their journey.

Tenten finally sighs, breaking the silence. "Lee," the ebony haired teen deflates at her tone. "Why would you say that to her? You do realise she could be set up and accused, right?"

"I know," Lee whispers. "But can you imagine anyone doing that to Sakura? She's been nothing but hardworking and truthful all this while. She does not deserve this."

The teen's eyes remain fixed to the ground as he walked, guilt lingering in his mind. "Besides, what could I possibly have said in a situation like that?"

"The truth," Gai's charismatic voice rumbled in the silence. "Sakura-chan has always had a wonderful grit, but even someone like her can grow tired of empty promises and lies."

Neji lets out a scoff. "You shouldn't have said anything. Even if she is innocent, the council will find a way to charge her with treason or put her on the death row for her critical mission failure. Sakura is a dead woman and she knows it."

"She's helped us out too, Neji. She helped you find that medicine for Hinata-san, didn't she?" Tenten reminded the pale-eyed boy who laughs dryly.

He tucks a loose strand of hair behind his ear, repressing a small fond smile at the memory. "I did not say that to insult her. I merely discuss the facts of her predicament," he adds softly, "and I pray the Gods will show her some mercy instead of whatever sick joke they think of next."

Gai glances at the young pinkette's parents, the embodiments of heartbreak. They carried their lives' most important assets on their backs, journeying away from a home that sought to punish their child, no matter if she was guilty or innocent.

 _'Kakashi, old friend, why did she come looking for Lee and me? Do you truly care so little for your student that it is ingrained in her that you will be of no help?'_ Gai takes a long breath to clear his mind.

The rest of the journey is silent, save for Mebuki's strained sobs.

\---

** Sakura **

_"Just go now and everything will be okay,"_

She shouldn't have lied to them like that. Nothing was going to be ok. She just didn't want her parents to be around to see what a twisted and ugly world shinobis operated in. She was glad she could spare them the agony of watching her head roll off a chopping block, or perhaps Konoha was more advanced than that. Maybe they'd burn her alive with a fire jutsu as tribute to the Fire prince who laid in the morgue.

Sai was still trailing behind her like a lost puppy – but she knew very well that this was a gift of leniency as compared to having multiple ANBU agents burning holes into her back with their gazes. Or being locked up in a cell. (Hah. Privileges she doesn't deserve.)

The moment she entered her abode, Sakura began sobbing endlessly, her home eerie silent and pitch black. Sai attempted to console her, rubbing her back with in an awkward rhythm. For a split second Sakura felt pride for the boy's appropriate reaction. Perhaps he had read it in one of his books.

She missed it already, her father's soft hum as he solved a crossword off the newspapers and how the lights were simply never flickered to darkness since her mother graded her student's papers till late into the night.

The pinkette sniffed before enveloping the pale skinned boy in a tight hug. Sai stiffens at the contact, unable to relax at the foreign sensation. Though he attempts to reciprocate the embrace by lightly cupping Sakura's shoulders.

She chuckled at the action, the sound closer to a choke than a laugh. "Not like that, dummy. Like this," she says as she directed the boy's arms around her shoulders. Usually she would've complained about the unfair height difference - but she craved the comfort more than anything else, even if it came from a friend of questionable social ability.

"I know you're not supposed to but," Sakura muttered against Sai's collar, "could I have some time alone before I have to meet Tsunade-sama at six? You can wait in the guest room, or just – " Sakura cuts herself off upon seeing Sai's nod.

"You will not see me, do not worry. And I will not judge." The ebony haired boy assured with his usual monotone. He forced what he felt was a genuine smile, one of his usual strained ones, "It's the last night before your hearing. I'll observe from afar,"

"Thanks, Sai." She whispers as her friend shunshins into the nearby distance, leaving her alone in the house.

She needed time to think.

There was something there, glaringly obvious that she wasn't quite picking up.

Wiping her tears and snot on the edge of her vest, Sakura pulls the Third's journal from it's inner pocket and seats herself on the cheap velvety surface of the couch.

She holds onto the Third's journal like a lifeline.

She needed to review what she had already known and what she now knew. The answer–

_Why her? Why was she in the centre of this mess?_

– was right at her fingertips. But for some absurd reason she just couldn't figure it out. It was a memory from what felt like a lifetime ago. A memory that her mind was desperately burying.

Shimura Danzo ordered the Uchiha massacre.

Danzo had went out of his way to provoke her and raided her home office of every reading, report and journal she kept.

What was so important that Danzo had to steal papers from her? What was he aware of regarding Sakura's academic pursuits?

There was something. He knew she would eventually realise it, with all the data in front of her it was simply a matter of time and sitting on the thought before she realised what the bigger secret was that she had stumbled apon.

Why she needed to be eliminated.

Fired, banished — no, dead.

Dead? Dead.

Who else read Orochimaru's journals? Who else had read that one lab report, a quarter written but all the theories laid out. She should have suspected it sooner, she should have seen it. She read it. She read of Hashirama's cells, a willing test subject, a lone child amongst dozens of dead, the eyes of chakra, ocular kekkei genkai—

And then she read of the slaughter of a clan filled with people with a particular type of dōjustu.

As she recalled the bandages around the man's entire arm and half his face, she finally realised that the dots connected too prettily.

A ploy to become Hokage?

No, he was tying up his loose ends.

(She gasped, grasping at her stomach as she ran across the hall barely making it to the bathroom as she threw herself over the bowl– )

She had gone back to look for the file, to be sure that it was him, but her workspace was robbed of every piece of research and reading that she had worked on in the last few years. She had been enraged at the action initially but knew it was no matter for she committed knowledge as precious as _that_ to memory – every word clear as day.

Alas, that had been the very thing that confirmed her hypothesis.

Under the bandages she could imagine it. How many could he fit there? Ten? Twenty? Cherry-picked off corpses of at least a hundred? Then she remembered how they looked like on _him_.

He was supposedly the last one.

_Black on red. Red, red, red –_

The blood on her skin had been red. How much more blood did Shimura-san have on his hands? How many of them were pasted on his arm as a badge of sick achievement?

( she puked. )

She gargled the strongest mint mouthwash she could find, letting the sting numb her mind for a blissful moment of thoughtlessness.

From the living room she heard the evening chime go off signalling that it was seven o'clock.

Oh.

She was late for the meeting with Tsunade.

As she rushed out the door she noted Sai's chakra trailing after her, never coming close enough for her to catch a visual of him.

She realises something, dismissing the thought as soon as it came. Denial.

(But God knows she and Danzo Shimura were one in the same. And she refused to acknowledge the fact.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tried to explore a little into Sai's character before we close this arc
> 
> also is it getting too complicated or convoluted? please do let me know if the story's too draggy 🥺
> 
> See yall soon✨


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyy!! We say goodbye to the Konoha arc here 🥺 (and we begin again soon) ;))
> 
> Extra extra long chapter, heads up!!

** Sakura - Present Day **

The lights were blindingly bright. Metal heavy around her wrists, clanking every time she moved even the slightest millimetre. The light brought no warmth to her in the cold concrete room. She shivered but she wasn't quite sure if it was the room's temperature or if it was just the feeling of the impending unknown. Uncertainty and anticipation were her cruel companions that tormented her as she awaited for her time.

The room was pure concrete. Endless, maddening grey. (Where on earth is the damn door, again?) The only way she had gotten in was with the guard's earth release jutsu. Was concrete even made of earth? Probably not. Was the room made of concrete, then? Sakura didn't know. So many uncertainties, so much she didn't know. At least she knew her parents were safe.

(Were they really?)

It was the day of the conference. She had only been in the holding cell for a grand total of what felt like an hour, just as Tsuande had mentioned to her the day before. Hiruzen's journal was tucked neatly back where it belonged (so that nobody would know that she had access to the Hokage's library when she really legally shouldn't) and yesterday stuck to her like a bad memory.

Yesterday was a grand mess. Seeing her parents off, the meeting with Asuma and Tsunade - the realisation of how truly and deeply screwed she was.

(She thought of the scroll she slipped into Tsunade's drawer and realised she felt no remorse for what she had done.)

(The risk she has put Tsunade in.)

(She was selfish.)

(What's new?)

(Ah, she's facing the consequences for her selfishness this time.)

She had seen Councilman Shimura from a distance while she entered the Hokage building in the early morning to report to her temporary cell. Beside her, Sai tensed subtly at the sight of the bandaged man habitually.

She hadn't been able to tear her eyes away from the bandages that ran across his left eye, curled all the way down around his arm. The cloth seemed more like a snake to her. Coiled around its eggs, protective, keeping them secret from predators and passersby alike.

Sakura was here because she knew that the councilman hid his eggs because they used to come in pairs.

She couldn't help the silent, humourless chuckle at how utter blind she had been to not have connected the dots quicker. Maybe then she could've escaped this path to death she walked on. Dear God, she might just have gotten herself onto the death row hadn't she?

Today was the day where her fate would be decided by the hands of the daimyou. The uncle of the man– the prince– that died in her arms after hours and hours of pumping and pumping and pumping chakra to not avail.

Maybe she shouldn't have set out to be a shinobi in the first place. Imagine it now, Sakura in a mindless civilian job. Writing away on a desk, perhaps as a civilian teacher. Red ink marking circles and crosses over paper and the smiley faces drawn on for her precious students who tried their very best even if they were lacking—

The walls rumbled, a block of concrete sinking to create a doorway for a burly bandaged man (not to the extent of Councilman Shimura) that stood behind it.

"Sorry about this, Haruno-san," he says kindly as a couple of jounin officers stream into the cell, unlatching the chains connecting her cuffs to the ground before ushering her out. Sakura smiles grimly at the bandaged jounin, not quite recognizing him but acknowledging a silent respect of comradeship from serving the same village. "What is there for you to be sorry for, Jounin-san?"

The duo of officers firmly tug on her chains. "Time to go." One of them say.

Mr. (Not Shimura-san) Bandage walks briskly ahead as the four of them made their way to wherever it is that Sakura's fate was meant to be determined.

"I'm sorry you have to go through all this," Mr. Bandage clarifies, pace not faltering the slightest as they walked. "You're a good doctor, Haruno-san. You may not remember me, but you treated me when the skin of my neck was burnt off," Mr. Bandage lightly taps on the side of his neck. Sakura chuckles breathily.

"Ah," Sakura exhales a puff of air in a humourless laugh. "I remember that now. You and your teammates, sixteen hours in the emergency room. I do hope there's been no complications." Mr. Bandage gives a visible nod at the pinkette's response.

"Not one complication, Doctor."

Sakura wanted to laugh at the absurdity of her situation - laugh at how her world was characterised by death and violence and yet she was here, cuffs and chains, for letting the wrong man die.

But Sakura knew she wasn't just here for that. She thought of a manila folder held in between bandaged fingers, sleepless nights with her nose buried in files and books she shouldn't have read and a slowly dying flame of fruitless ambition to chase exceptionalism that tied a pretty pink ribbon around her current predicament.

There couldn't be a more wrong time and place for anyone to have messed up this bad.

They paused at a deceivingly plain door, completely unlike the many grand ones used in the administrative and Hokage buildings for foreign guests and important conferences. Sakura has walked past this door plenty of times to recognise it.

Private court room B, left wing of the Hokage building.

Used for closed hearings that almost always go up to the High Council Court due to cases of treason, conspiracy, espionage and the whole happy lot of crimes that end with a head down on the chopping block.

A good handful of jounin stand guard at the door's vicinity, directing foot-traffic away from the court. Mr. Bandage turns to her a smile of sympathy on his slightly chapped lips. "While you're in there, Haruno-san, please remember there are people who want to believe that you're innocent." He firmly squeezes the girl's shoulder. "Please don't prove us wrong." 

\---

Sakura blinked. The hearing had been going on for quite a while now.

She's never been involved with the legislative side of Konoha before this, so the whole experience was quite unlike the dramatic court proceedings the papers and movies liked to sensationalise.

She expected the Daimyou to be a screaming mess. She expected verbal abuses and venomous spit. Instead, the man was silent. Perhaps she over-worried when Tsunade warned of the Daimyou's spiteful nature. 

The courtroom was mostly silent aside from the judge's occasional comments and inquiries as well as the public prosecutor's dull drone as he presented his case information. Councilman Shimura was nowhere to be found, Tsunade sat on a long bench at the back of the room and Asuma was by the defense attorney's table across the public prosecutor's.

Sakura was tense under the calmness. Nothing good ever comes out of silence.

"I don't see how any evidence in your case points to the accused having any intent to have taken action leading to the purposeful death of Lord Himeyori's nephew–" the judge paused, "Captain Kotaro, was it?"

"Yes, your honour," the captain responded before clearing his throat. "This is simply just the superficial description of what we have concluded to be the truthful sequence of events, your honour."

The judge scoffed and leaned forward in his seat, "Well captain, I can and have read that in the pre-hearing material you and your team has submitted. What I want to know is why the public prosecution is accusing Ms Haruno of intentionally killing the late Fire Prince. Do you not have a single piece of evidence for your case, captain?"

"Well, uuh...Your honour, my team and I –"

"So I take that to mean you have no evidence, Captain Kotaro? And you are accusing Ms Haruno, infamously known as the youngest and most skilled medical practitioner of this generation, a proven to be loyal shinobi time and time again, to have committed high treason?"

"Yes, your honour. As mentioned at the beginning, the accused was not legally authorised to be assigned to this confidential mission."

Sakura dig her nails into the skin below the cuticle of her thumb. Was she supposed to be relieved that the judge's opinion was in favour of her complete innocence right now? She caught Asuma in a moment of eye contact. The man offered a small smile and a nod of confidence.

The judge sighs, "That still doesn't answer the accusation of murder, Captain Kotaro. Nonetheless, yes, I agree the accused wasn't supposed to be on the mission. Defense, your response?"

Asuma promptly turns and spits his gum into a piece of tissue (you can't smoke in the courtroom, much to Asuma's dismay) and gathers his files while marching towards the center podium.

"A guardian?"

All attention shifted to the daimyou who had spoken for the first time since he had arrived. Sakura was caught off guard by how silky smooth the old man's voice was. Well, he wasn't even that old – further along his mid-sixties was more likely. She had expected an ancient man, voice like gravel with an unpleasant nasal element. The daimyou revealed no emotion as she spoke.

"Why do you defend the accused when you have sworn to protect the royal blood?"

Asuma's gaze is unwaveringly confident as he responds to the daimyou promptly.

"It is because I believe in her innocence, my divine Lord. She should not be sent to death for following orders and for a a misfortune that befell upon her. These ambushers came to assassinate the young Lord and every last escort. She was lucky to escape death."

"Then is it not her own failings then that led to my nephew's death?"

Asuma shook his head. "We have reason to believe that an S-Rank assassin with a peculiar skill set is responsible for this. This ambush was an usual one. She was outmatched even before the fight began, my divine Lord."

He continued, "Sakura had exhausted every cell in her being to save the young Lord and I believe that in itself is proof of her loyalty to this village and country."

(An unpleasant feeling sank in her stomach. All these people who believed in her suddenly?)

The daimyou nods silently at Asuma's lengthy response before glancing to the judge seated a level below him. "Proceed." The daimyou says.

The judge nods. "Yes, divine Lord," A clerk stands suddenly, handing the judge the next set of materials for reference. The courtroom was silent for a moment as the judge went over the papers.

"The accused claims the attacker used a tendril technique during the ambush?"

"Yep. The autopsy reveals tendril-shaped inflicted wounds on the young Lord's upper abdomen and arms, your honour."

"Ah yes, you've provided me the autopsy report here." The judge hums in approval as he goes over the material. "And you are aware that the only S-Ranked nin currently known to use this technique is Kakuzu of the Akatsuki, yes?"

"Yes, your honour."

"–and so you are arguing that the accused was caught in an Akatsuki ambush?"

"Not necessarily an ambush planned by the Akatsuki, your honour. Kakuzu is known to act independently from the group as a bounty hunter."

The judge nods, "that sounds convincing. It is likely that is the accurate truth. What is the accused's ranking?"

"Upper B-rank," Asuma supplies.

"Now that turns us to the next question, Sarutobi-san. Why is a B-tier nin, no matter how gifted you claim her to be, given the direct order to proceed with a mid-A rank mission?"

"Permission to call a witness to the stand, your honour,"

"And who is this witness?"

"Lady Hokage, your honour."

The judge raises his brow at that. He inhales sharply and releases a sigh. "This is a messy case, Sarutobi-san. At this point I will not be ruling for a death sentence or imprisonment at all. Are you sure you want to extend this case to include Lady Tsunade?"

Tsunade's heels clack against the wooden floors as she walks to the courtroom's centre.

"She insisted, your honour."

"Then so be it." The judge shook his head disapprovingly, waving his hand disinterestedly toward the clerk. "Approved. Say your piece, Lord Hokage."

Tsunade scoffed. "I _will_ say my piece, Hasato-san."

"Decorum, Lord Hokage."

The blonde grunted in disapproval but made no other resistance to the required formality. Sakura didn't know whether to snicker to cry when she caught sight of the same sheet of paper they had messily scribbled on in their drunken state last night in her mentor's hand (and nothing else). "Yes," Tsunade's voice resonated around the room. 

"By conventional regulation, Sakura should not have qualified to have been assigned the mission. But let me put this out on the table– Konoha has historically placed prodigies and high-potential nins on assignments well above their rankings. Kakashi Hatake, Ibiki Morino and several others have been placed in high portfolio assignments well beyond their rankings at the time. This was to accelerate skill growth since these shinobi are identified to be exceptional," 

"I'd like to point out that Sakura isn't the only one that I've identified as exceptional during my office, Hasato-san," Tsunade's gaze pierced into the judge's own though he remained unshaken his her intimidation tactics. "You're an excellent legal practitioner, Hasato. There was no point in letting you learn the ropes as a junior attorney."

The judge nods in his seat, keeping his composure as he stared right back at the Hokage. "I believe the point has been established, Lord Hokage. Would you like to conclude your testimonial?"

Tsunade nods, "What I'm saying is, the kid was simply at the wrong place at the wrong time. This is an assignment gone wrong caused by uncontrollable, external elements. No murder plot on her end," The blonde's sharp gaze wandered to meet Sakura's in her makeshift open cell. "As her mentor, I can guarantee that she has had no prior indication of alarming behaviours that would have led to intent to murder."

"Well," Hasato clears his throat, "Then there's clearly no evidence for Ms Haruno's guilt. Does the public prosecution really not have a single piece of evidence to –"

The door opens silently, but the distinct clacking sound of a walking cane announces the man's arrival.

Captain Kotaro turns his head from the door to the judge so quickly Sakura was surprised he hadn't gotten whiplash. "Permission to submit evidence and to call a witness to stand, your honour!" The captain blurts out in a hurry.

The judge narrows his eyes at the witness in question before glancing at the Hokage whose fists were shaking – in visible fear or anger, Hasato needed more information to decide. "Proceed."

Shimura Danzo toys with a small oval-shaped device in his palm as he strolls to the stand, a ROOT member dutifully depositing two stacks of files trailing after him. One on the captain's desk and the other on the judge's desk. The man says nothing as he clicks a button on the device but the smug smile on his face his barely noticeable. 

Sakura sank in her seat. If he says the right thing, it's all over. She had been tormented by the uncertainty over the past days yet at this very moment was when Sakura felt it. The torture of not knowing. Which folder was Danzo presenting to the court?

 _"I assume you're familiar with the works of Orochimaru?"_ Danzo's voice plays over the tape.

 _"Is immortality really such a sin? "_ She hears her own voice on the device. _"Is it wrong to want to preserve life? Precious life? Is it wrong to want to be a genius? Because this research will put my name up with Orochimaru's as legendary scientific minds that could offer solutions to the failures of humankind. You are a fool to stand in my way, Councilman."_

Sakura was shaking. How hilarious was this? She was done for. She's as good as dead, she's going to die she was going to the death row she was going to–

Danzo pauses the recording, pressing another button that she presumed was to rewind the clip. He hands the device to the clerk who in turn hands it to the judge. The judge replays the recording and listens to it beyond what Danzo had played for theatrics. 

"The second folder, your honour."

Sakura felt her blood run cold.

Danzo says with a boastful tone of mock respect. The judge, for the first time since the hearing began, slowly begins to leak his emotions to the floor. His face morphs into one of horror as he glances between the Hokage and the councilman.

"Councilman Shimura, you are accusing Haruno Sakura of extending the forbidden works of Orochimaru?" The judge clarifies. The daimyou shoots up, stiff as a board at the mention of the name.

"You better have sufficient evidence, Shimura! This..." the daimyou shook his head. "This is beyond high treason. If you are saying she was _harvesting_ my nephew–"

Sakura winced. Nail on the head.

"I assure you, divine Lord," Danzo's smile widens, "that is exactly what I am saying."

"That's bullshit!" Tsunade slams her fist against the bench, splitting the wood at the point of impact. "–Decorum, Lord Hokage!" Hasato goes unnoticed.

Danzo scoffs at Tsunade. "Divine Lord, you see how violent and volatile Haruno's mentor is. Is it not believable that the girl was exploring past documents that she shouldn't have access to? The council is already dealing with Lady Tsunade's blatant favouritism and manipulations of the law. She has enabled and encouraged Haruno to take up Orochimaru's work through her own manipulations."

"I had no idea that she was going through Orochimaru's old documents," Tsunade seethes.

"Oh so you admit you enabled her to pursue that line of work? Regardless of which sources were inspiring her?" Danzo gives Tsunade a look of triumph.

Asuma jumps in to salvage their case, fist pressed against the table surface. "Permission to call Haruno Sakura to the stand, your honour," Asuma grits his teeth, "Let the researcher explain her work without someone else taking it out of context."

"These are raw files, Sarurobi-san. I cannot help but to draw the same conclusion." Hasato looks apologetically at Asuma.

"She's a medical researcher, Hasato. It's a research to regenerate the limbs of amputees for God's sake! Let the girl explain herself!" Tsunade interjects.

Hasato shakes his head. "The research is untitled and left without abstract on its objective. I cannot–"

"Fifth folder, your honour. Our dear Ms Haruno was looking for a test subject to apply Orochimaru's immortality jutsu onto."

Oh _fuck_. So that was the folder he had.

Tsunade goes silent. She turns to Sakura, a look mixed with betrayal, disbelief and panic all at once.

 _You didn't tell me about this part._ She understood from her expression. Sakura shook her head. _Nobody was supposed to know._

"Let her speak." The daimyou decides after a moment of silence, overruling Judge Hasato.

Sakura could feel her accelerating palpitations, deafening her to her surroundings as she heard the daimyou. The one thing Tsunade told her to do was to not talk about her research. And here she was, being told to do exactly as she wasn't supposed to.

Sakura stood at the stand (she didn't even realise she had moved?), shaking. Her eyes locked onto Tsunade's own burning gaze.

"All I wanted to do was help people." Sakura answered weakly. Tsunade shook her head and Sakura knew what the woman was conveying to her because deep down, she herself knew it.

_You don't search for immortality to save others. You do it to save yourself._

"It started off is bio-chakra research. Semi-artificial cell duplication," Sakura was still looking at the blonde woman who begun to fade into expressionlessness. "Then I thought, what if I could temporarily induce indestructibility? Wouldn't that remove the need for cell replacement? Because the injury could be avoided entirely?"

Hasato observed the two women, clicking his tongue in frustration.

"I hope you realise that doesn't explain why you were exploring the aspect of immortality," the judge says. Sakura nods in response. "I got carried away. But I swear, I never intended to apply the immortality jutsu nor recreate it. I was merely studying the mechanism of it to translate it into more relevant use in my actual work."

The courtroom was silent once again. The confession was clear. 

The clerk stood and announced, "We will now take a recess to allow sufficient time for the judge to pass his ruling."

Sakura was hauled away back to her makeshift cell, watching Tsunade turn around and walking out of the courtroom without so much as a glance in her general direction, face devoid of emotion.

Sakura hated it. Execute her, scorn her, banish her! She could have taken it all. But not this. She should have known. Kakashi, her parents, Sasuke -- Everyone eventually stops _seeing_ her, stops caring. She was fine not existing in their world. Tsunade was hers. Where did that leave her if Tsunade herself couldn't bring herself to care anymore? 

Tsunade didn't come in to listen to the final verdict.  
  
  
\--

The judge found her innocent of all murder charges. 

The judge found her guilty of illegal experimentation and illegally conducting unethical and formerly outlawed research. 

The daimyou interpreted her case as one of an over-ambitious academic attempting (and failing) to apply their work to a real, living (dead) being. He agreed on the ambush being an anomaly - but that was a done case. 

Sakura lived to see another day. Just not in this country. 

The verdict was as followed. Banished from the Land of Fire with conditional re-entry. Banned from stepping into Konoha territories and from legal medical practice as well as research. Given 24 hours to remove herself peacefully from Fire Country soil and thereafter force will be exerted to ensure her complete removal from the country. 

This time it wasn't Sai who stood by her as she packed her belongings. ROOT operatives (Danzo's doing, of course) and ANBU alike stood at attention, weapons ready to be drawn on her if she made the slightest indication of resistance. She ended up bringing along very little personal belongings. Clothes, weapons and supplies for means of survival, money and a couple of books. She was grabbing the old friendship bracelet she and Ino made from the corner of her vanity drawer when she saw a familiar photo at by her bedside of her as a young genin alongside Naruto and- 

She placed the photo faced down. That time is gone. 

On her way out, she notices another photograph. A more recent one she had printed out just a few months ago right after it was taken. Sakura smiled at the memory - The picture was taken on 25th November, Sai's self-declared birthday. They made one up for him since he hadn't known. Nobody in ROOT ever mentioned anything about birthdays, Sakura remembered the pale-skinned boy had said. 'These two aren't teammates,' Sakura thought to herself. She slots the frame into her backpack before taking one last look at her childhood home. She considers for a moment to bring along a photo of her parents, but decides against it when she couldn't even see a single family photo in the living room. 

She walks towards the gates as dawn begun to break. She breathed the cool morning air of her home one last time as she watched the warmest and gentlest sunrise in the country. The sight comforted her enough that she almost forgot about the ANBU behind her. 

"Sak'ra," warm, blonde hair and happiness called out to her. Sai stood next to him, a solemn expression on both of their faces. Ino was there too. Shizune, and of course Tonton. (And Kakashi.) Shizune came forward to her first with a scroll. 

"Its from Lady Tsunade," Shizune said with a weak smile, "She couldn't bear to see you off. I'm sorry." 

"Don't be. You're here. You're all here," Sakura offered a small smile to her friends and teacher. "I'm grateful,"

Uncharacteristically, Naruto had few words for parting. He maintained a sorrowful gaze on his friend, Kakashi's hand placed comfortingly on his shoulder. 

Ino spoke suddenly, "You've got plenty more time before your 24 hours is up. You sure you don't want to hang around a little longer?" Sakura glanced at the empty street behind her, a handful of ANBU and ROOT operatives still lined sparsely to give the illusion of privacy in her final moments in Konoha. The judge deemed her worthy of such respect at least. Sakura knew nobody in the village could see her as the same teenager ever again after the whole ordeal. She didn't want to see her own people scorn and curse at her more than she already had. 

"No," Sakura shook her head, "I don't think I will." 

Kakashi cleared his throat, catching her attention. "You got everything you need?" He asked. Sakura nodded, "Yeah. All set." The silver-haired man returned the nod. "You'll do well out there on your own. You're a smart kid." Sakura smiled politely at her genin teacher. She couldn't help but feel disappointed that something she had hoped for for so long felt so empty and meaningless. 

"Oh," Sakura jolted in surprise, "I almost forgot," she said as she removed her forehead protector from its place on her head. Her hair fell forward as the cloth brushed against her skin and finally rested upon her hands. 

"No!" Naruto yelled spontaneously. "Nope, no. You keep that. You're keepin' that 'ttebayo," 

Sakura shook her head. "Its either I scratch it out or I leave it here," she held eye contact with the yellow-blonde boy. "At least this way, I can say some corny shit like - _oh my loyalty and love never left Konoha_ ," She offered some humour to lighten the mood. Ino jabbed her side with a forced laugh. "You better not lose that bitchy attitude of yours, Forehead. Or I'll come and cut you." 

Sakura laughed along with her childhood best friend before turning back to a lost Naruto. "Hey," she said, "it's cool. We'll see each other again some day. I'll be here and there, don't worry," Sakura bit her lip. Should she have said that? She wasn't even sure what awaited her beyond the gates. 

"We'll find a way to let you come back home, Sak'ra. I swear it," Naruto clenched his fists the way he did when he promised to bring home their old teammate. Huh. How ironic. How sad. The fate of Team Seven was indeed one of misery and misfortune. 

She offered a weak smile in response. 

"Don't make promises you can't keep." 

Naruto averted his gaze, unable to admit that he too knew that there was very little he could do to fix this. Sakura had done this to herself. She made her bed, she must lie in it. 

"I better get going. I was planning on crossing the forest while the sun's at its worst," her smile dipped into a frown for a split second as she felt her chest begin to constrict. "You don't have to go just yet," Shizune repeated Ino's offer to say a little while longer. She shook away the tears brimming in her eyes. "No, the longer I stay the more I'll be scared thinking about what comes next. I have to go." 

Shizune nodded and pulled Sakura in for a hug. One by one she embraced those who came to see her off. Kakashi held her the longest oddly enough and pulled away with a soft mutter of words. Sakura merely nodded and shrugged away from the man. As she walked to the gates, she could sense the ANBU dispersing into the forest and her friend's chakra signatures diminishing ever so slightly with distance. Odd. _Except for one that was -_

"Sakura," Sai grabbed her by the wrist. "I know I may not be the most expressive, so I want you to know that we mean it. I mean it. We will find a way to see you again. We will find you and we'll be together again," Sai hastily says. Sakura was momentarily taken aback by the sheer amount of expression the boy emitted for the first time but nonetheless smiled and responded briefly. 

Sai nodded, hesitating in his decision if he should part with her there or continue to hold on fruitlessly. "I..." Sai cleared his throat awkwardly. 

"I read in a book somewhere, that home is where the people you cherish are and not necessarily the physical location," Sai choked on his words slightly, "I hope you meet good people out there while waiting for us." 

Sakura nodded, "Thank you, Sai," she shifted her feet backwards, walking while keeping her gaze with the boy. "I'll see you whenever I see you." And she finally turned to leave Konoha for good. 

Somehow, her naivety and childishness led her to believe that goodbye was always the end. And so she hoped that if she never uttered the word, there was hope for her. Hope for everything to go back to the way it was. 

But nothing would ever really be the same. 

Admittedly, she didn't quite want it too.

\---

Shizune hadn't felt like returning to the office after seeing Sakura off in the early morning. She supposed Tsunade could deal without her for one day. And perhaps the extra work would help her take her mind off the pinkette. 

So Shizune and Tonton hopped off to the nearest bar. It was mid-day and most bars weren't opened for the evening yet. The brunette found a more secluded izakaya bar just by the boundary of the Red Light district open for lunch. Thankfully, they served their evening alcohol all the same, just with more food than just edamame (salted soy bean pods) and yakitori sticks. She never thought she'd be one for day drinking. Maybe it was karma for always being upset with Lady Tsunade for her round-the-clock, all-day any day attitude with alcohol. Or maybe it was just the fact that someone she regarded as her own sister was banished from her own country today. Yeah, that. 

Admittedly, she drank a little too much. She probably wasn't walking straight as she walked out the bar, more than just a little tipsy. Oh, she probably stepped on Tonton's legs one or twice too. Oops. Her stomach churned, a sharp pain taking her by surprise as she leaned into an alley way to relieve the pain. Wiping her mouth with her kimono sleeve (ew.), the brunette was far too intoxicated to notice the blurred figure dashing madly towards her, weapon drawn, before her world went dark. 

Shizune felt tired suddenly. And so she slept. 

\---

The news broke hours later. Two mutilated bodies. Both women. Assumed double suicide. 

**_Tsunade Senju and Kato Shizune._ **

_The seat for Hokage was left empty for one man to seize._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thats a wrap for the konoha arc! I'll be back soon (soon?? eventually?? maybe just scratch out the soon--) 
> 
> I'll be back with the next portion of the story :)) This fic is also up on wattpad just a reminder if thats more your thing
> 
> Leave a comment c yal later bye!!!


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